What we can do to help the families left behind by the Fallen 44 | Lifestyle.INQ

OCTOBER 27, 2022

I won’t dwell on the political angle because that isn’t my field of expertise. Neither will I harp on what went wrong, because that’s for the government and the military to find out. But, like the rest of the nation, I want justice to be served.

The 44 courageous young men who valiantly died in Maguindanao had their whole lives ahead of them. They were fathers, husbands, brothers and sons.

We wept unabashedly because they died so gruesomely, because they could have been our brother, son, partner or father.

Grief is a long, drawn-out process. It’s a sad and difficult journey that cannot be measured, more so when the circumstances surrounding the death are tragic, such as what happened to these young men in Mamasapano town last week.

Wish list

What then can we do for the families left behind by these heroes? How can we channel this overwhelming grief into something constructive?

Here is my wish list for everyone left behind by the Fallen 44.

1) There is so much goodwill going around as a result of this tragedy—many kind and generous hearts who wish to donate funds to support the families now bereft of a breadwinner. I wish that some private foundation known for its integrity and transparency will take this cause on as part of its fund-raising efforts. The foundation, of course, will have to account to the donors as to how, to whom and for what the funds are disbursed.

2) For the Philippine Psychiatric Association to work closely with the military in providing pro bono psychosocial support and counseling to the bereaved family members for two to three years. There is just so much trauma and sadness to process that it boggles the mind and breaks the heart.

3) That schools and universities will offer grants and scholarships to the children of the Fallen 44. Education is still the best weapon one can arm oneself with.

4) Livelihood programs or jobs for the surviving family members of the heroes.

5) Health and medical services for free in the first two years for the spouses, children and parents of the heroes. Grief takes so much work, and physical illness or ailments often set in within the first two to three years after a major loss. We all know that healthcare in the country is very expensive. Perhaps there can be a list of accredited government hospitals where these family members can seek help and be attended to immediately without having to worry about the costs.

6) A monument or a marker to the fallen in a strategic area within the Philippine National Police compound to honor their bravery and to serve as a reminder, something tangible, that the bereaved can visit and find consolation in. It shall also serve as a reminder to all of us about the price we’ve had to  pay for peace.

So that when peace finally comes to that part of the country, it will be cherished and not taken for granted ever again.

Healing

Although it’s laudable to give financial assistance immediately, it’s not enough to provide just that. Lives have been marred and irreplaceable damage has been done in the wake of this senseless tragedy. Even as we as a nation grieve over the manner by which these men have had to give up their lives, much healing needs to be done.

Let’s begin by taking care of our own. In the process of helping them heal, we ourselves begin to heal, too.

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