The 4 causes of human problems | Lifestyle.INQ

OCTOBER 27, 2022

Marilen Tantoco, Amb. Bienvenido Tantoco Sr., Maritess Tantoco-Enriquez

Your mantra for the week: “When I am fearful, a conversation with God quells my fears.”

In IAMISM, there are four fundamental causes of human problems: fear, hostility, inferiority and guilt.

Fear is probably the easiest to identify. Psychologists say there are six primary fears: fear of ill health, fear of criticism, fear of the loss of love, fear of poverty, fear of old age and fear of death.

All of these fears are expressed in various ways, but can be gleaned most easily with the use of our vernacular words, “baka (probably)” and “eh kung (what if).”

It is unfortunate that religion has failed to stress what is found in the Holy Book, in Job 3:25: “For what I fear comes upon me, and what I dread befalls me.” People constantly underscore their fears, not knowing that the fear they dread will be upon them.

These days, fear of ill health should have been lessened with the advent of preventive medicine and multifarious supplements to strengthen one’s immune system and promote longevity. Nevertheless, fear of ill health persists.

As for fear of criticism, Filipinos have been overly concerned of what other people would say about us, so much so that each one has created an inner prison comparable to that infamous bookshelf that hid a secret prison cell.

After many years of astrological counseling, I have met people who imprisoned themselves with “baka ano’ng sabihin ng tao (what will people say).”

You can easily free yourself from this incarceration by having a mantra and sincerely believing that what people think and say of you is none of your business. Take note, it is they who are doing the thinking, and not you, unless you are dependent on these people for food, clothing and shelter, in which case you are truly in prison.

Regarding fear of the loss of love, I have yet to understand why this has become a real fear. How can anyone experience the loss of love unless they mean the death of a loved one?

But if it means that they would be left without love because of separation, divorce and other incompatibilities, then that kind of loss is an illusion. When one remains loving under all circumstances, love will always be with you and loss of love simply means the fear of being alone. When one is truly loving and accepts the concept of the Presence of the God within, one can never be alone.

The last three kinds of fears will have to wait. Better still, let them go and start thinking rich, let go of all the thoughts of lack and limitation, keep fit, stop counting the years and live every day fully and gratefully and realize that death is just a new beginning.

Natori at 40

Succumbing to the personal invitation of Josie Natori were the elegant ladies of Manila from all age groups —they who own a Natori item, a necklace, lingerie, caftan or any of her dress creations that have been selling worldwide for 40 years. They gathered and filled the Manila House in Bonifacio Global City.

The still beautiful Lorna Laurel with daughter Jojo sat with sisters Menchu Concepcion and Ching Montinola. I sat with Jane Prieto, daughter of Karilagan model Nancy Howell and Raffy Prieto. Raffy and Giovanni Sanna—who has become a monk in far away Italy—introduced the Pierre Cardin-style barong in the late ’60s.

Jojo Zabarte and Mayenne Carmona admired an alluring young lady whose presence we were seeing for the first time. She turned out to be Margo Midwinter, a British-Filipino, with no indication whatsoever of the Filipino part. She hosts a show on the Lifestyle Channel.

Everyone was enthralled by Natori’s designs on different silks. What they like best about Natori’s creations was its caressing softness.

Nedy Tantoco, elegant in black and white, played host together with her father, Ambassador Bienvenido Tantoco Sr., and sisters Marilen Tantoco and Maritess Enriquez. It was also great seeing the grand dame of Inquirer, Marixi Prieto, accompanied by her daughter, Inquirer president Sandy Romualdez.

Marilen Tantoco, Amb. Bienvenido Tantoco Sr., Maritess Tantoco-Enriquez

Here’s to the next 40 years of Natori!

‘Art of Luxury’ travel

One of the most successful events of the week was by Philippine Tatler Traveller last Monday at Raffles and Fairmont Makati. It promised an extensive exposure to the Art of Luxury travel and it kept its word—showing what global brands offer.

We were served gustatory treats from all corners of the globe and,
naturally, champagne flowed. People stayed to find out who would win those amazing travel prizes which the Traveller does every year.

The ballroom was packed to the gills—one of the reasons being the well-loved personality of Mia Borromeo, so much so, you even get Ramon Jacinto to attend.

Mia was enjoying her first cycle since she celebrated a birthday on the 21st of May, which promises expected and unexpected blessings.

If you were to greet everyone you knew at the ballroom, there will be enough time to hold only a one-minute conversation with each guest—and still be unable to talk to all.

Prizes were won by Joemarie Treña, Carmela and Angelina Legaspi, Helen Ong, Margie Moran-Floirendo, Bettina Osmeña, Ann Ong, Besty Westerndorp and Renna Angeles.

Not often seen in big gatherings—because of her backbreaking schedule on ABS-CBN which starts with “Headstart” at 8 a.m. and ends with “Bandila” at midnight—was Karen Davila.

Susan’s Roses

After flying high and going through a luxury magazine like Traveller with Rissa Mananquil-Trillo on the cover, keep “grounded” by browsing through this comfort pamphlet and patronize a few of its features—a salon named “Saudia Hairlines,” have dinner at “The Last Supper” located beside a funeral parlor or treat yourself to a bouquet of flowers from “Susan’s Roses.”

E-mail the columnist at [email protected].

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