Date, Marry, Dump: TV edition

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Marry Boff Kill. It’s a game made popular by our beloved show 30 Rock. The writers of TGS give each other three names and ask—who would they marry, who would they “boff,” who would they kill?

This Valentine’s week, we at Super decided to play a cleaner version of the game. Date Marry Dump. We look at 14 hot TV shows and tell you which of the characters we think you should Date, Marry and Dump.

30 Rock

Date Liz Lemon, Marry Jack Donaghy, Dump Jenna Maroney.

Liz Lemon is smart, witty and undemanding (her idea of a good date is hanging out on the couch and watching on TV). We also love that she enjoys food—she can polish off a huge steak in seconds and chose not to give up that crazy sandwich with the killer gravy at the airport’s security check.

Jack Donaghy is a tough negotiator but a sweet dad and protective of the people he loves. Just don’t mind the pre-nup he’s sure to make you sign.

Jenna is vain, high-maintenance and incredibly needy. You’ll be screening her calls in no time.

Grey’s Anatomy

Date Jackson Avery, Marry Alex Karev, Dump Owen Hunt.

Jackson is hot—do you need any other reason?

Karev was a tough guy who turned out to be such a sweetie—plus he’s excellent with kids.

Owen has issues with anger and is narrow-minded.

Big Bang Theory

Date Sheldon Cooper, Marry Leonard Hofstadter, Dump Howard Wolowitz.

Sheldon is cute and funny, even if he doesn’t always mean to be.

Leonard is dependable and thoughtful.

Howard lives with his mom and had that episode with the robot that we just couldn’t forget.

Two Broke Girls

Date Max Black, Marry Caroline Channing, Dump Oleg.

Max is a lot of fun. She’s willing to be your lookout if you decide to graffitti up a wall and she bakes excellent cupcakes (even if she uses cake mix).

Caroline is ambitious and driven and knows how to deal with difficult situations.

Oleg is a creep.

New Girl

Date Schmidt, Marry Nick, Dump CeCe.

Sure, Schmidt can fill up a douchebag jar in seconds but he cooks like a chef, is charming and loves to bare his abs.

Nick is monogamous, caring and sensitive.

CeCe is wild and always surrounded by hot male models.

What about Jess? She can be your friend.

Modern Family

Date Phil Dunphy, Marry Gloria Pritchett, Dump Claire Dunphy.

Phil is goofy—you’ll have a lot of fun with him on dates.

Gloria isn’t just gorgeous, she’s a great mom and she has a beautiful heart.

Claire is too high-strung and she will never let you win.

CSI, C.S.I. New York, CSI Miami

(yes, all three)

Date Nick Stokes, Marry Mac Taylor, Dump Horatio Cane

Nick looks like Superman.

Mac is mature, responsible and has a strong sense of justice.

Horatio refuses to lose the shades.

House

Date Gregory House, Marry James Wilson, Dump Eric Foreman.

House is a loose cannon. He might give you a thrill at first but it will get tiring pretty fast. (One word: Cuddy.)

Wilson is a solid and sensitive guy. And if he has the patience to deal with House, he’ll have the patience to deal with you.

Foreman is a first-class jerk.

How I Met Your Mother

Date Ted Mosby, Marry Lily Eriksen, Dump Barney Stinson.

Ted is fun to be with but sometimes he’s more in love with the idea of love than with you.

Lily loves kids and is nurturing.

Barney has been with too many girls. Just make sure you dump him before he dumps you.

The Office

Date Erin Hannon, Marry Jim Halpert, Dump Dwight Schrute

Erin is super cute, bubbly and perky.

Jim is funny, solid and a one-woman man.

Unless you want to live in a beet farm and be with a guy who likes setting an office on fire, stay away from Dwight.

Vampire Diaries

Date Stefan Salvatore, Marry Damon Salvatore, Dump Katherine Pierce

Stefan is a tortured soul so he might be a wet blanket after a few dates.

Damon can be very bad but when he’s good, he’ll make you melt.

Katherine is pure evil.

Saturday Night Live

Date Seth Myers, Marry Andy Samberg, Dump Bobby Moynihan

Seth is sure to be a great conversationalist. Just make sure to brush up on your American politics.

Andy is a hilarious chameleon. You’ll never get bored.

Bobby’s antics can get tiring really fast.

Glee

Date Santana Lopez, Marry Kurt Hummel, Dump Rachel Berry

Santana and her crazy one-liners will amuse you.

Kurt is such a sweetheart and has a beautiful soul.

We’re so sick of Rachel—aren’t you?

American Idol

Date Steven Tyler, Marry Jennifer Lopez, Dump Ryan Seacrest

Wouldn’t you want to be serenaded by rock royalty?

Jennifer will rock your world—if your name isn’t Marc Anthony.

Ryan will spend more time on his hair than you will.

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