Latest Stories

Inner Awareness

Why do the dead visit the living?


Dear Mr. Licauco,

Thank you for sharing with the rest of the world your wisdom and understanding on the paranormal. My mom and I read your books, which have been really helpful to us. We also follow your articles in PDI and listen to your DZMM radio show every Sunday. Congratulations and more power and blessings to you!

I sometimes see shadows or silhouettes moving in the house, office buildings, etc. and there are rare times I see “real people” like kids running around or a man sitting on his desk in a barong—things like that.

Last year, I accidentally stepped on a dwarf in Greenbelt, and that night, started having rashes all over my body and face. I had to be rushed to the ER the next day. Doctors could not diagnose the cause of my swelling/rashes. I had to resort to an albularyo or espiritista, and that’s when I found out I accidentally stepped on a dwarf while hearing mass in Greenbelt.

Anyway, my question is really about the very recent and unexpected death of a former boyfriend. We were together for only three to four months toward the last quarter of 2007, and we were both at our crossroads. We both decided to go abroad separately. He went to the Middle East, and I to the US. We were still close and in contact until 2008, when we started to drift apart.

To cut the long story short, we became “acquaintances” when we separated physically, and there was a time I got so bitter and angry with him that I told him he was a jerk or an a-hole (can’t recall now, honestly, I seem to have blocked him and that chapter in my life off), and I don’t even remember what he said to me when I said that.

Then our friends told me that he passed away last March 12 in the US after a surfing accident. I felt a mixture of feelings—anger, sadness, shock, grief, pain, regret, guilt. When this was all confirmed, I sent flowers to his wake, and offered daily masses for his soul in the US. Fortunately, he was cremated here in Manila. I went to his wake here two times and the searing question in my head was answered, when his best friend told me that we had something special.

An audience

I dreamt of him twice. The first one was after his cremation. He was standing and looking at a wall filled with stuff, and I approached him and talked to him. We looked like we were chit-chatting. I do not recall what we talked about; it was like I was an audience in my dream. However, he looked cool, calm, relaxed.

The second dream was last week. I was inside a store at the mall, and there was this guy at this shop who placed a gold bracelet with charms on my right wrist. While putting it on me, he said  “Milton (the deceased) wants you to wear this and said he will talk to you when you’re ready.” I had no reaction in my dream, I was just stoic.

Also, the week he died, my Chapstick on my dresser rolled and dropped to the floor. The other day, my round metal bracelet was flung from the top of the dresser, and rolled under my bed.

Lastly, I find myself being “urged” to visit his crypt on a weekly basis, sometimes twice a week. I don’t mind. I still cry and feel sad when I remember him or visit him. May I know if you think that what I am going through is normal for someone who lost someone? Or do I feel his spirit?

I guess what I am asking is 1) When a person dies unexpectedly, does his soul linger on earth or move on to the next life? 2) Are my “urges” to visit him in his crypt my own subconscious way of making up for my guilt, or is it possible that his soul wants me to visit? 3) Is it a good thing to pray, and to ask Milton that we talk to each other in my dreams?

Thank you so much for your time and help.



Dear Amalia,

I am glad to know that you and your Mom read my books and weekly column, and my Sunday radio program over DZMM Tele-radyo.

Here are my comments on your letter:

1. There is a community of elementals, nature spirits or elves, especially near the back of the church in Greenbelt, Makati.

2. Your story about your relationship with your ex-boyfriend lacks very important details I need to answer your questions more accurately. For example, why did you get bitter or angry with your boyfriend? Why did you call him “a jerk” and an “a-hole”? What did he do to you that made you react that way to him? Another thing not clear is, why do you feel guilty? What did you do that made you feel guilty?

3. You dream about him because he is still earthbound and wants you to know he is alive. He still has not accepted his death. In the second dream, he told you he will talk to you “when you are ready.” He will actually do this as soon as you get over your extreme grief.

4. The paranormal or poltergeist activities you experienced in your room with the Chapstick and bracelet could be his doing, just saying he is still around—or they could also be the work of the nature spirits in Greenbelt who followed you.

The soul does not forget

5. It is normal for lovers and even ex-lovers to experience extreme grief when one dies even if they already parted ways, because the soul does not forget. Spirits communicate with the living in many different ways, involving either the sense of sight, sound, smell, touch, and even sometimes taste.

6. I can’t answer your question on whether your strong urge to visit his crypt weekly is caused by your guilt feelings, unless I know why you feel so guilty now that he is dead. You obviously are not the cause of his death, so I can’t understand this guilt.

7. The length of time a newly departed soul stays on earth depends on his or her state of consciousness. Sometimes it takes only a few days before a soul ascends to the next higher plane. The 40-day period is just a matter of tradition. The Christians adopted this from early Egyptian beliefs about death. Elvis Presley can still be seen in Memphis, Tennessee 35 years after his death. And so are some wellknown historical figures in England and France.

8. Prayers help the dead realize that they are dead. But it is not advisable to call on the spirits of the dead because you only disturb them. If a spirit wants to communicate with you, he will find ways to do it. If he does not, then you can assume he has already accepted his fate and is now in peace.

E-mail jaimetlicauco@yahoo.com; visit www.jimmylicauco.com; listen to my radio program on DZMM Tele-radyo every Sunday, 8-9 p.m. Call 8107245 or 0920-981-8962 for questions. The next Basic ESP and Intuition Development Seminar is scheduled on May 12-13, 9 a.m.-5 p.m., at Rm. 308 Prince Plaza I, Legaspi St. Greenbelt, Makati.

Follow Us

Follow us on Facebook Follow on Twitter Follow on Twitter

Recent Stories:

Complete stories on our Digital Edition newsstand for tablets, netbooks and mobile phones; 14-issue free trial. About to step out? Get breaking alerts on your mobile.phone. Text ON INQ BREAKING to 4467, for Globe, Smart and Sun subscribers in the Philippines.

Tags: Death , Lifestyle , Mind and Body , Paranormal Activity

  • joseph bautista

    Try to read the bible it is all there you need to answer with your problem, firstly when people died he cannot come back that is why the bible said “it is appointed for you to live once after that judgement, which means you are no way to come back, the same way with the story of Lazarus where Jesus says in His story of this, poor man and the rich man after they die and the rich man is begging to come back to life, but is not allowed to. Now what about those things that you see, they are familiar spirit( evil spirit) they study you and they can copy those people that has pass away, just to entice you to fear and do something, feeling of guilt, and oppressed you, they can go to dreams, because in dreams you are subjected, so you don’t have control of things, he can put those thoughts in you! The devil does all this things, Jesus said ” the enemy(satan) steal kill and destroy but I came so that you may have life and have it abundantly”(John 10:10) My prayer for you is to take heed of that warning and blessing so that you can live your life to the fullest, of what God intended it to be!

  • Gilberto Reyes

    I am a bit confused about the letter sender. She said they got separate when she went to the US and he to the middle east, and yet he met an accident in the US? If there are no factual error, then after separating they were both in the US, in a way nearer to each other.

    Likewise, there is another word or sentiment – regrets. The sentiment or word “guilt” is more personal in nature. A person may feel guilty and yet the other party did not feel slighted or aggrieved. Likewise, guilt would pertain that she did something that would explain the guilty feeling. Regrets is a bit lighter, dreaming of what could have been.

    Perhaps, she is regretting the life that they could have together, she could have had a life with him. As it sounds, she is still single and had not found someone else to share her life, that she chose to be a “martyr”, “a grieving widow”. 

Copyright © 2014, .
To subscribe to the Philippine Daily Inquirer newspaper in the Philippines, call +63 2 896-6000 for Metro Manila and Metro Cebu or email your subscription request here.
Factual errors? Contact the Philippine Daily Inquirer's day desk. Believe this article violates journalistic ethics? Contact the Inquirer's Reader's Advocate. Or write The Readers' Advocate:
c/o Philippine Daily Inquirer Chino Roces Avenue corner Yague and Mascardo Streets, Makati City, Metro Manila, Philippines Or fax nos. +63 2 8974793 to 94
  1. 12 other things you can do at Pico de Loro Cove
  2. Lover’s quarrel linked to hunger – study
  3. Encounter with a ‘Mangkukulam’
  4. ‘Kamias’ for fever, ‘siling labuyo’ for headache–first aid in the kitchen
  5. How Vitamin B can be a remedy for ‘manhid’ and neuropathy
  6. Summer treat for your aspiring astronomers
  7. Sarah Geronimo and Matteo Giudicelli sing ‘All of Me’–and we all swoon
  8. Marcos grandson to wed beautiful Rocha scion
  9. 90 percent of Filipino households don’t practice proper toilet hygiene, sanitation
  10. ‘Heaven is for Real’: Nonfiction book on life after death reaches screen
  1. Dominique–Gretchen and Tonyboy Cojuangco’s daughter–now an endorser
  2. Why is the lifestyle set now afraid to wear jewelry–before Kim Henares?
  3. Marcos grandson to wed beautiful Rocha scion
  4. France makes work beyond 6 p.m. illegal
  5. Sarah Geronimo and Matteo Giudicelli sing ‘All of Me’–and we all swoon
  6. South Koreans crave Asia’s smelliest fish
  7. Ever heard of HydroBob?
  8. How Vitamin B can be a remedy for ‘manhid’ and neuropathy
  9. 90 percent of Filipino households don’t practice proper toilet hygiene, sanitation
  10. Prince William fuels speculation of second royal baby
  1. Mary Jean Lastimosa is new Miss Universe Philippines
  2. Did Angara ruin Pia Wurtzbach’s chances at Bb. Pilipinas?
  3. Dominique–Gretchen and Tonyboy Cojuangco’s daughter–now an endorser
  4. Manila in shock over model Helena Belmonte’s death
  5. Vinegar test helpful vs cervical cancer
  6. From Jeannie to mom of suicide victim
  7. San Vicente beaches hidden but not for long
  8. Borgy and Georgina are back; others are off–again
  9. Sen. Angara: I thought Pia Wurtzbach gave a good answer
  10. Ex-Givenchy model fights for ‘Yolanda’ survivors


  • No noise, partying in Boracay on Good Friday
  • More legal woes for Cedric Lee
  • NATO ups military presence amid Russian threat
  • DOH issues official statement on confirmed case of MERS-CoV
  • Aquino to stay at home during Lenten holidays
  • Sports

  • Tenacious Iran frustrates Qatar to retain Asian Club volleyball crown
  • Floyd Mayweather is ESPN’s top-paid athlete
  • Pistorius trial: Judge sets 2-week adjournment
  • China, Taiwan rout foes for 3rd, 5th places in Asian Club volleyball
  • Ginebra’s new import Freeman arrives, makes PBA return vs ROS
  • Lifestyle

  • Are your favorite malls open this Holy Week break?
  • Celebrate Easter Sunday at Buddha-Bar Manila
  • Moriones feast: A slow, steady transformation
  • Weaving ‘palaspas’ a tradition kept alive in Tayabas City
  • Finalists announced for best translated books
  • Entertainment

  • Filipino rock icons to hold silent concert
  • Mommy Dionisia Pacquiao’s greatest hits
  • Deniece Cornejo posts bail—report
  • Miley Cyrus hospitalized, cancels US concert
  • Otaku Summer Jam 2014: Summer’s hottest J-rock/Cosplay event
  • Business

  • Russian economy hit by Ukraine turmoil
  • PSEi firms up ahead of Lenten break
  • I-Remit teams up with Lakhoo for remittances from Oman
  • Megawide nets P1.4 B in 2013
  • Longer TRO sought on rate hike
  • Technology

  • Smart phone apps and sites perfect for the Holy Week
  • Tech company: Change passwords or suffer ‘Heartbleed’
  • Filling the digital talent gap
  • SSS to shut down website for Holy Week
  • Another reason to quit social media this Holy Week: your safety
  • Opinion

  • We may never know
  • Couple of things
  • Mommy D’s magic
  • Stop bizarre and bloody Good Friday rituals
  • Holy Week taboos
  • Global Nation

  • Netizens welcome Japan’s visa-free travel plan
  • Visa-free travel by Filipinos to Japan still a proposal
  • Visa-free travel to Japan could boost tourism
  • 2 PCG men ordered arrested over Balintang Channel shooting
  • US Embassy closed on Holy Thursday, Good Friday