Quantcast
Latest Stories

Emily’s Post

Resist the urge to start a scandal at your husband’s office

By

DEAR EMILY,

My husband and I separated a few months ago, because of the usual reason—a third party who is his officemate. Is it proper if I inform the company of their immorality? The mistress is married but has been separated for a long time now.

I just want to give them a lesson, and I know that it is my right to do it. Don’t worry. I will do it discreetly by sending an anonymous letter to the upper management. But the question is, will they believe me?

—Troubled Wife

Answer:

No, don’t even think about it! Don’t do anything that will compromise your dignity. Your separation is between you and your husband, whether there is a third person involved or not.  Nobody put a gun to anybody’s skull!

Throw plates at each other or claw each other’s eyes in the confines of your bedroom. You don’t need an audience for that. Do you have children? If so, that’s one more reason to hold your head up high to protect them.

You and your husband have a shared history and no matter how lusty and passionate his romance is with this other woman, the thought of his children laughing and playing and being near him, surely tugs at his heartstrings, like it or not.

If you value what remains of your family, breathe hard, bite your tongue and control your impulse to make their lives miserable, no matter how wonderful you’ll feel about it. Whatever you sow you will reap. Spread kindness and patience, and fate will reward you with so much more. The law of boomerang, you know?

Who knows how their relationship will turn out. It might not be as short as a hiccup, but it could turn out to be just a fever. Make him regret leaving you.  Though what you’re going through may be as painful as having your tooth pulled without anesthesia, whatever sacrifices you endure now will be worth it. Nobody is saying it will be easy. He may or may not find the way back home to you again, but be proud of yourself for being a class act.

Nothing will make you love yourself more than going through a storm and not losing your head throughout the ordeal. As one writer said: “Act as if what you do makes a difference. It does.”

E-mail emarcelo@inquirer.com.ph or emarcelo629@gmail.com. Visit my one-woman painting exhibit, “Landscapes in Oil,” at Chef Jessie’s Rockwell Club in Rockwell, Makati City, which runs until Feb. 7.


Follow Us


Follow us on Facebook Follow on Twitter Follow on Twitter


Recent Stories:

Complete stories on our Digital Edition newsstand for tablets, netbooks and mobile phones; 14-issue free trial. About to step out? Get breaking alerts on your mobile.phone. Text ON INQ BREAKING to 4467, for Globe, Smart and Sun subscribers in the Philippines.

Tags: Avenging Wife , Failed Marriage , Marriage , Mistress , Relationships

  • Patas

    Nice point, Emily!

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100000532465679 Donardo Cuago

    GREAT ADVICE!

  • catalansbarce

    Excellent advise. Compassion instead of vengeance.

  • gudwil2all

    everybody in the office knows already for sure
    ang tsismis part of everyday office life

    • http://profile.yahoo.com/BV6DWTSUHKJGFANJJ5P3WPPTQM Paul

       that’s true for sure…walang bago sa sasabihin nya….malamang dahil sa ugali ng babae nagkaganun un lalaki bagamat desisyon pa rin un nun lalaki.

  • anneleia

    Good advice! Just move on even it will cause you a lot of pain.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100000532465679 Donardo Cuago

    “Make him regret leaving you.”

    THIS IS THE ULTIMATE REVENGE!

  • rickysgreyes

    Do NOT create a scandal in the office. Just cut off his d-i-c-k.

  • angie1875

    Play the martyr wife role? That is an advice I think a priest (meaning male) will give….let the man have his fun and pray na lang.We do have immorality as a basis for hiring and firing employees so the wife is within her legal rights. It is not undignified to claim what is yours in a legal way.  If your cellphone was stolen, you have every right to report it. Same w/ a stolen hubby. Go give them a good fight legally. It will show your kids that you can stand up when you know you are right. If your husband beat you, cheated on you, you fight back legally. God helps those who help themselves.

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_L3NJ4IIZZMB2OMPIOR7X2B72ME k

    emily’s advise is more of on moving on smoothly…i agree!

  • E Rigby

    Great advice as always, Emily!   By making a “scene” at her husband’s workplace, the act will not only demean the husband but will demean her as well.  It should not be considered at all. 



Copyright © 2014, .
To subscribe to the Philippine Daily Inquirer newspaper in the Philippines, call +63 2 896-6000 for Metro Manila and Metro Cebu or email your subscription request here.
Factual errors? Contact the Philippine Daily Inquirer's day desk. Believe this article violates journalistic ethics? Contact the Inquirer's Reader's Advocate. Or write The Readers' Advocate:
c/o Philippine Daily Inquirer Chino Roces Avenue corner Yague and Mascardo Streets, Makati City, Metro Manila, Philippines Or fax nos. +63 2 8974793 to 94
Advertisement
  1. Are your favorite malls open this Holy Week break?
  2. ‘Labahita a la bacalao’
  3. This is not just a farm
  4. Why is the lifestyle set now afraid to wear jewelry–before Kim Henares?
  5. Clams and garlic, softshell crab risotto–not your usual seafood fare for Holy Week
  6. Sarah Geronimo and Matteo Giudicelli sing ‘All of Me’–and we all swoon
  7. 12 other things you can do at Pico de Loro Cove
  8. Moist, extra-tender blueberry muffins
  9. How Vitamin B can be a remedy for ‘manhid’ and neuropathy
  10. Are your favorite malls open this Holy Week?
  1. Dominique–Gretchen and Tonyboy Cojuangco’s daughter–now an endorser
  2. Why is the lifestyle set now afraid to wear jewelry–before Kim Henares?
  3. Marcos grandson to wed beautiful Rocha scion
  4. France makes work beyond 6 p.m. illegal
  5. Sarah Geronimo and Matteo Giudicelli sing ‘All of Me’–and we all swoon
  6. South Koreans crave Asia’s smelliest fish
  7. How Vitamin B can be a remedy for ‘manhid’ and neuropathy
  8. Ever heard of HydroBob?
  9. 90 percent of Filipino households don’t practice proper toilet hygiene, sanitation
  10. Boots Anson-Roa to wed in Eddie Baddeo
  1. Mary Jean Lastimosa is new Miss Universe Philippines
  2. Did Angara ruin Pia Wurtzbach’s chances at Bb. Pilipinas?
  3. Dominique–Gretchen and Tonyboy Cojuangco’s daughter–now an endorser
  4. Manila in shock over model Helena Belmonte’s death
  5. Vinegar test helpful vs cervical cancer
  6. From Jeannie to mom of suicide victim
  7. San Vicente beaches hidden but not for long
  8. Borgy and Georgina are back; others are off–again
  9. Sen. Angara: I thought Pia Wurtzbach gave a good answer
  10. Ex-Givenchy model fights for ‘Yolanda’ survivors

News

  • DOH asks co-passengers of OFW carrier to test for MERS-CoV
  • ‘Shouldn’t we move?’ Ferry evacuation under scrutiny
  • 5.5-magnitude quake hits Sultan Kudarat
  • Passengers denied chance to escape sinking South Korea ferry
  • Firetruck rams California eatery; 15 injured
  • Sports

  • PH youth boxers off to stumbling start in AIBA World tilt
  • Durant has 42, Thunder beat Pistons 112-111
  • Walker leads Bobcats over Bulls in OT, 91-86
  • Man City slips further out of title contention
  • Federer would skip tennis to be with wife, newborn
  • Lifestyle

  • Pro visual artists, lensmen to judge Pagcor’s photo contest
  • ‘Labahita a la bacalao’
  • This is not just a farm
  • Clams and garlic, softshell crab risotto–not your usual seafood fare for Holy Week
  • Moist, extra-tender blueberry muffins
  • Entertainment

  • Will Arnett files for divorce from Amy Poehler
  • American rapper cuts own penis, jumps off building
  • Jay Z to bring Made in America music fest to LA
  • Why Lucky has not bought an engagement ring for Angel
  • Derek more private with new girlfriend
  • Business

  • Asia stocks fail to match Wall Street gains
  • Fired Yahoo exec gets $58M for 15 months of work
  • PH presses bid to keep rice import controls
  • PSEi continues to gain
  • Number of retrenched workers rose by 42% in ’13
  • Technology

  • DOF: Tagaytay, QC best at handling funds
  • Smart phone apps and sites perfect for the Holy Week
  • Tech company: Change passwords or suffer ‘Heartbleed’
  • Filling the digital talent gap
  • SSS to shut down website for Holy Week
  • Opinion

  • Editorial cartoon, April 17, 2014
  • A humbler Church
  • Deepest darkness
  • ‘Agnihotra’ for Earth’s health
  • It’s the Holy Week, time to think of others
  • Global Nation

  • Syria most dangerous country for journalists, PH 3rd—watchdog
  • Japan says visa-free entry still a plan
  • First Fil-Am elected to Sierra Madre, Calif. city council
  • UC Irvine cultural night to dramatize clash of values in immigrant family
  • Filipino sweets and info served at UC Berkeley Spring Fest
    Marketplace