Quantcast
Latest Stories

Forever 81

Apples and star apples (and everything else)

By

“STA. APOLONIA, Patron Saint of Dentists” ART BY GCF AND OWNED BY DR. LILLI ANN D. FERNANDO

There’s a stall on Timog selling Pambansang Lechon.  How can any nationalistic soul pass up a product like that!  I told my driver to buy one-half kilo.  Before we sat down to eat I made my grandsons put their hands over their chests and recite:

I love the Philippines

It is the land of my birth;

It is the home of my people

It protects me and helps me to be strong, happy and useful…

Then I read in Krip Yuson’s column that there’s a bespoke beer called Katipunan.  That’s a bit harder.  Do we prick our fingers to put a few drops of blood into the brew before drinking it?

What’s new about all that? said Bong de la Torre.  Meron na ngang Pambansang Kamao (Manny Pacquiao), Pambansang Ena-Momi Dionesia, Pambansang Bakla (Ricky Reyes).

Excuses

Later on, my two naughty grandsons were suggesting “gracious” excuses I could give for refusing attendance to some event:

“She’s having a tattoo.”

“She’s having her navel pierced.”

“She’s got Mad Cow disease (Madali ’yan lola, matagal ka ng meron niyan!)”

“She’s planning an insurrection.”

“She was summoned to the Vatican.”

“She’s communing with the lilies.”

“She’s out of body.”

 

Furious at Facebook!

I am just sitting here utterly minding my own business when I find that I have three Facebooks, none of them opened by me!  Isn’t it a cybercrime to open a Facebook pretending to be someone (me) and even answering letters people send (me)?  Irony is, I can’t even find out what’s in them because I have no true Facebook of my own!

I ignored it for a long time, hoping those Facebooks will die a natural death, but they didn’t.  Then one day an old friend from Malabon, whom I hadn’t seen for several decades, wrote me an open letter in her Facebook, citing several specific locations in Malabon where my relatives live… I think that’s dangerous!

A lot of nice people I do know have even asked to be my “friend.”  I wonder if the keeper of those fake sites accepted them, and, if not, do my friends think I’m snubbing them?  If someone is answering them, who is it?  And if he or she does, what does that awful creature say?

This multiple impersonation has been reported by us to Facebook.  They cancelled one, but it was soon replaced by another!  I am fuming and demand an answer!

Chicken eggs corn feed?

Laid Poultry Supply

Contact Rhorie

Words

I’m still wondering how these current corruptions got so popular:  “No worries” for “don’t worry”; “Sakto!” instead of “Exacto!” Did its users get it from the Coke commercial, or did the commercial get it from the people?  “Okay na pu ito?” to mean, “Are you through?” or “Shall I take away the used plates?” from waitresses and maids alike.

Lanelle’s birthday

Many, many Sundays ago was Lanelle’s 58th birthday party in Crescent Moon.  It was a lugaw party with 58 condiments, from century eggs, to tofu of all kinds, to pickles, to salted fish and shredded pork and beef and chicken.  And the table stretched from end to end.

More or less 300 guests came, and I met the Antipolo cream and some Manila cream (and custard, too) and they overflowed to the garden by the carp pools.

Lanelle and my departed son Bey’s older daughter, Majalya (Jali), is now in Zanzibar (Africa) on a practicum for the course she’s taking up in Washington; it has to do with some sustainable environmental ek-ek, and she’s very excited about it.

The younger girl, Chin Chin, is out of the country, too.  She is a UP graduate of drama, specializing in dance.  She is in Hong Kong for a contractual Disneyland dancing job.  I told her she would die of cold in those short tutus and she will starve because she can’t eat any of that nice Chinese food because she has to keep to a certain unreasonable weight.  But her friends all think it’s a dream job so she won’t listen to me.

They’re my first apos who are staying abroad for longer than usual and I was so sad about it. They are both single and very pretty.  Who knows if  they will not fall in love and marry some dumb foreigner and never come back!

Leaves

The winds have brought down the red-brown leaves of the old santol tree.  They are rolling all over the cement of the carport and the stones of the garden with a sad, dry rustle.  Curled up and withered, the leaves remind me of old age and make me sad.  Soon they will go into the compost pit to decay.

Above, however, the bower has sprouted small orange flowers, attracting some of the new migratory birds.  They are swifts, tiny and impertinent, and go ssssst! ssssst! with a kind of whistle, just like sassy street boys trying to attract attention.  Since I’m all alone I assume the whistle is for me, and I smile.

Soon, however, the resident fantails, the noisy tarat, frighten the swifts away with their ratatatat.  They claim back their feeding station.  I sigh and go back to my newspaper and its bad news.

Mango of my pie

Let me end on a happier note with an anonymous “poem” I once got by e-mail.

You are the

Apple of my eye

Mango of my Pie

Palaman of my tinapay

Teeth of my suklay

Blood of my atay,

Bubbles of my laway

Sala of my bahay

Foundation of my tulay

Seeds of my palay,

Clothes from my ukay-ukay,

Calcium in my kalansay

Calamansi of my siomai

Knot of my tie

Toyo of my kuchay

Vitamins in my gulay

Airplane of my Cathay

Stars of my sky

Hammer of my panday

Sand of my Boracay

Sultan of my Brunei

Highland of my Tagaytay

Mole of my Ate Guy

Spinach of my Popeye

Sizzle when I fry

Wind when I paypay

Tungkod when I am pilay

Feeling when I’m high

Shoulder when I cry

Wings when I fly

Prize when I vie

Cure to my “aray”

Answer to my “why”

The life after I die

Leftover paintings

I am inviting those who are interested in purchasing, at low prices, my old paintings left over from former shows to tea on April 5, 3-5 p.m. Please leave name and telephone or cellphone with Aiko or me (tel. 4113048).

Have a good rest-of-the-day!


Follow Us


Follow us on Facebook Follow on Twitter Follow on Twitter


Recent Stories:

Complete stories on our Digital Edition newsstand for tablets, netbooks and mobile phones; 14-issue free trial. About to step out? Get breaking alerts on your mobile.phone. Text ON INQ BREAKING to 4467, for Globe, Smart and Sun subscribers in the Philippines.

Tags: fake Facebook accounts , paintings for sale , Pambansang Lechon , Senior



Copyright © 2014, .
To subscribe to the Philippine Daily Inquirer newspaper in the Philippines, call +63 2 896-6000 for Metro Manila and Metro Cebu or email your subscription request here.
Factual errors? Contact the Philippine Daily Inquirer's day desk. Believe this article violates journalistic ethics? Contact the Inquirer's Reader's Advocate. Or write The Readers' Advocate:
c/o Philippine Daily Inquirer Chino Roces Avenue corner Yague and Mascardo Streets, Makati City, Metro Manila, Philippines Or fax nos. +63 2 8974793 to 94
Advertisement
  1. How to enjoy Buntod
  2. Kim Atienza: At home with art and design
  3. Life lessons I want to teach my son
  4. No tourist draw, Malang the croc will remain wild
  5. ‘Wild West’ Masbate’s pristine marine gems
  6. The best flavors of summer in one bite, and more
  7. How Zsa Zsa Padilla found Conrad Onglao; Sharon Cuneta played Cupid
  8. Homemade yogurt, bread blended with pizza, even ramen
  9. What has happened to Barrio Fiesta and Singing Cooks & Waiters?
  10. Haneda International Airport: A destination on its own
  1. How Zsa Zsa Padilla found Conrad Onglao; Sharon Cuneta played Cupid
  2. How to enjoy Buntod
  3. Historic Fort Bonifacio tunnel converted into a septic tank
  4. How Margie Moran-Floirendo keeps her dancer’s body
  5. Are your favorite malls open this Holy Week break?
  6. Miss America: Don’t suspend teen over prom invite
  7. ‘Wild West’ Masbate’s pristine marine gems
  8. Kim Atienza: At home with art and design
  9. ‘Labahita a la bacalao’
  10. Life lessons I want to teach my son
  1. How Zsa Zsa Padilla found Conrad Onglao; Sharon Cuneta played Cupid
  2. Mary Jean Lastimosa is new Miss Universe Philippines
  3. Did Angara ruin Pia Wurtzbach’s chances at Bb. Pilipinas?
  4. Dominique–Gretchen and Tonyboy Cojuangco’s daughter–now an endorser
  5. Vinegar test helpful vs cervical cancer
  6. From Jeannie to mom of suicide victim
  7. San Vicente beaches hidden but not for long
  8. Borgy and Georgina are back; others are off–again
  9. Why is the lifestyle set now afraid to wear jewelry–before Kim Henares?
  10. Sen. Angara: I thought Pia Wurtzbach gave a good answer

News

  • Smooth Edsa ride up in 2 years, but…
  • Obama: US will defend Japan vs China
  • Santiago accuses Lacson of fronting for Enrile, Gigi Reyes
  • Name names, Lacson told
  • Ukraine FM: We are ready to fight Russia
  • Sports

  • Sharapova advances to Stuttgart quarterfinals
  • Galedo caps ride of redemption
  • Beermen, Express dispute second semis slot today
  • Lady Agilas upset Lady Bulldogs in four sets
  • NLEX roars to 7th D-League win
  • Lifestyle

  • Marinduque: Visiting the ‘palm of the ocean’
  • First at Vatican in 60 years
  • How Jing Monis Salon gave Krissy the pixie
  • Want to be a supermodel? Work on your inner beauty, says Joey Espino
  • Denims that keep you cool–literally
  • Entertainment

  • Kristoffer Martin: from thug to gay teen
  • Has Ai Ai fallen deeply with ‘sireno?’
  • California court won’t review Jackson doctor case
  • Cris Villonco on play adapted from different medium
  • OMB exec’s assurance: We work 24/7
  • Business

  • Nielsen sees car buying boom in the Philippines
  • How author of best-seller exposed ‘one percent’ economic elite
  • Bangko Sentral readies new bank lending rules
  • Gaming stocks gain, PSEi eases on profit-taking
  • Cebu Pacific flew 3.74M passengers as of March
  • Technology

  • Vatican announces hashtag for April 27 canonizations
  • Enrile in Masters of the Universe, Lord of the Rings?
  • Top Traits of Digital Marketers
  • No truth to viral no-visa ‘chronicles’
  • ‘Unlimited’ Internet promos not really limitless; lawmakers call for probe
  • Opinion

  • Editorial Cartoon, April 25, 2014
  • No deal, Janet
  • Like making Al Capone a witness vs his gang
  • MERS-CoV and mothers
  • A graduation story
  • Global Nation

  • HK victims to get P115M; traders raised money
  • Afghan hospital guard kills 3 American doctors
  • Career diplomat is new PH consul general in Los Angeles
  • US4GG: Aquino should ask Obama for TPS approval, drone technology
  • Complex health care system for California’s elderly and poor explained
    Marketplace