On its dedication page, Green had written “To Esther Earl.” That is an important clue to an entirely separate but also sad and clever story, the life of Esther Grace Earl, who was diagnosed with Thyroid Cancer in 2006 and died in 2010, shortly after turning 16. Green has clarified that Esther is not Hazel, that he had been working on his book about cancer before he met Esther.
This is something we discover early in “This Star Won’t Go Out: The Life & Words of Esther Grace Earl” by Esther Earl with Lori and Wayne Earl (Dutton Books, New York, 2014, 430 pages). Green supplies the best-selling book’s introduction. “Esther inspired the story in the sense that my anger after her death pushed me to write constantly,” he writes, adding that Esther did inform his vision of empathetic teenagers. “I am astonished that the book has found such a broad audience, but the person I most want to read it never will.”
That person was an exceedingly intelligent but also utterly normal girl whose family had moved to France when she first found out she was sick. As they moved back to the United States, Esther deals with her situation by writing about it, through entries in her diary, on websites and in YouTube videos. “Star” lovingly revisits these entries, including Esther’s artwork and even transcripts of her chat sessions. In these pages, Esther comes across as being unpretentious, usually exuberant, genuinely honest and self-aware: “I may only live a short time,” she writes. “It sucks, man. But I mean, it’s the truth, and the truth is icky.”
Touching friendship
A “Harry Potter” fanatic and a follower of Green, Esther (Persian for “star”) gets to meet the author at a Boston HP convention called LeakyCon 2009 and the two begin a touching friendship. As Esther’s condition worsens and she is often confined to bed (with the ever-present cannula in her nose), she finds a world of friends over the Internet. “The Internet was one of the only places Esther could go and not be treated as Cancer Girl,” one of her closest friends writes. It is through the Internet that Esther gathers a world of followers and inspires others as she manages to remain optimistic. Her Skype group (Cattitude) and online community (nerdfighters) rally around her—and mourn once she is gone. The title really fits Esther’s personality and explains the effect she had on everyone she met.
“Star” even includes examples of Esther’s fiction, but is also has essays from her friends, followers and even her attending physician. But aside from Esther, “Star” shines a light on her family, with their regular online updates on Esther’s condition down to the end. Esther’s father Wayne is crushed and thankful, providing a deeply moving eulogy that is as snarky as Esther was. The scene where Angie pushes her wheelchair-bound sister Esther around a cemetery as Esther picks out her future grave is a sad and touching scene instead of strange. Esther’s photos from different times in her life inhabit page after page.
Whether intentional or now, it is impossible not to draw parallels between “Fault” and “Star,” with the publicity image of Woodley as Hazel (cannula in her nose) looking eerily like the smiling photos of Esther. Esther probably would have adored “Fault” and would have been psyched for the movie. After “Star,” you’ll feel like you really knew her as well.
It is impossible to read “Star” to its conclusion with a dry eye. Esther’s life will break our heart but also inspire you. The Earls established a foundation—This Star Won’t Go Out (TSWGO.org)—that supports the causes that Esther believed in. “This Star Won’t Go Out” is a testament to a life well-lived and a girl much missed. Read this book. Remember Esther Grace Earl and remember to whom this book is dedicated: “To all who long to live fully and love deeply no matter the obstacle or length of days.”
Available in hardcover from National Book Store.