DEAR Emily,
I’m a relatively newly hired public-school teacher. In August 2012, I had a baby, and being a single mother, I couldn’t avail myself of maternity benefits. My boyfriend and I live together but couldn’t get married then.
Then problems started coming. I found out he cheated on me in January 2013 and though I tried to forgive him, I began to be afraid for my future. He has become a changed man. In one of our quarrels, he even pointed a knife at me. I don’t want to be with a man who’s irresponsible and cruel.
But here’s another big problem. I found out I am again pregnant with my second child. What shall I do? This will be more immoral because I am still not married. But despite this situation, I’d rather live as a single mother.
Will I be fired by the school superintendent? Or, to avoid that, choose to get married to this man?
HELPLESS
I have news for you. The public school system in this country has moved out of the dark ages and is now part of a liberated 21st century. For this, your fear of getting fired by the school superintendent for your pregnancies is now lifted. No more reason to go from the frying pan to the fire.
As per Republic Act 9710: “Pregnancy outside of marriage may not be used as a reason to expel or refuse teachers and students from school. Section 13 (c) Expulsion and non-readmission of women faculty due to pregnancy outside of marriage shall be outlawed.
No school shall turn out or refuse admission to a female student solely on the account of her having contracted pregnancy outside of marriage during her term in school.”
Your more pressing problem now is your cruel, no-good boyfriend.
A man with half a brain—no matter the circumstance—has no right to intimidate someone weaker than himself! Temper almost always clouds the mental state of an unstable jerk. And most frightening, how long before that knife he pointed at you, in another burst of unmitigated anger, penetrate your skin, draw blood, and possibly kill you? And also, how long before he shacks up with another woman and possibly leave you for good—with an accidental third child your way?
There is no legal document binding you to him. There is no statute in the land saying you must stay with a creep who got you pregnant—twice! You have the freedom to get as far away from him as possible, without repercussions from the law or civil society. More so now that you have your life to protect for the sake of your children.
You must get rid of him! It’s a no-brainer. Didn’t you allude to that yourself?
E-mail the author at emarcelo@inquirer. com.ph or emarcelo629@gmail.com.