I write this because one of the most difficult things for me to do is not to worry about the future. I worry about the future constantly that I forget about the present.
A client of mine once asked me to write about how to get rid of worry. It was then that I realized that I did not know how. Worrying was so part and parcel of my day-to-day mind game that I did not even realize that I was worrying or that I was in a state of worry by default.
I know that we’re not to sweat the small stuff, true—but what about the big stuff? It is easy to say “do not worry” when it comes to day-to-day trivialities, but what about telling a mother to stop worrying about her child? Or how do you not worry about your dwindling bank account and how there are still no job offers after several months of trying? How do you not worry about your future?
Here are some tips that have helped me and I hope they help you, too.
Like attracts like
If ever there was a deterrent to worry, this would be it.
One of the better known energetic laws of the universe is the law of attraction, the main gist of it is that like attracts like. As such, if you are fearful and live in constant fear of something, it actually happens to you because you attract it.
Hypochondriacs (those who fear illness) are sick a lot. Those who fear losing, fail a lot. Those who worry carry the same energetic frequency as fear.
Worry about something enough, you will actually cause it to happen. Worry that you will never have enough, and you won’t.
Counter worry with positive thoughts. If you are going to focus your energy on worrying, try focusing on the opposite of what you are worrying about. For instance, take a scenario where you are worrying about not having enough cash to pay for your medical insurance. Rather than worry about not having enough cash, focus your attention on how to raise the cash between now and the time your premiums are due.
Or, if you worry constantly about your son driving home at night when he is out, get him to use a car service like Uber so that you are assured he will get home safely even if he has a bit too much to drink.
Focus on the positive solutions rather than worry about the problem.
Gratitude
A great way to retrain your brain to focus on the positive instead of worrying or pondering on the negative is gratitude and appreciation. I hear a lot of people complaining about their jobs; my answer is always be thankful you have one.
You will never know the value of something until it is taken away from you. So next time you complain, you might want to think of what will happen if that person or opportunity were not in your life.
Appreciate what you have and do not dwell on what you don’t have. For instance, if your Meralco bill makes you cry each month, find a way to cut down on your electric costs—but also when you write the check and pay the bill say thank you that you have enough money to cover the bill and that you have the luxury of electricity.
These little luxuries are taken for granted more often than they are appreciated. You never really think about your water and electricity at home until a typhoon comes and deprives you of them for a couple of days. Then they become the most important things in your life.
What you are grateful for and appreciate will multiply just as what you are worried about will multiply. So find a way, as difficult as it may seem sometimes, to look at what you appreciate and are grateful for. It will make you a much happier person and believe me, it will also attract into your life more of what you are appreciating or better.
You have only today
Think of today as your gift, that’s why it is called the present. It is not easy, I’m the first person to have difficulty with this. So I consciously make a decision every day that what I do today, what I do now, what I accomplish today is what matters. Not tomorrow.
Tomorrow may never happen, but what I do today can make a difference in my life and another person’s life. I pay the bills I can pay today and create a plan of how I can pay my future bills. Knowing that my plan is sound and in place, I work each day and focus on each day, literally one day at a time to get the stress out, the worry and anxiety out.
Take care of today, then tomorrow will follow. It is a mind-set and a discipline that requires commitment and determination.
Somehow our brains have been defaulted to negativism and worry. It is up to us to rewire our brains toward positive thinking in the now. Every day, one step at a time, try to focus your attention on the now, what you are being right now.
After about a week of practicing this, it will become second nature. Then you just might find yourself not only worrying less but not worrying at all. Add the fact that you will receive the greatest gift of all, being happy with yourself right here, right now, just for the now.
