Dear Emily,
I’m a 30-year-old female with a career. My boyfriend of three years just dumped me because he is now a born-again Christian, and I didn’t follow him because I am an atheist.
It’s very difficult being an atheist in a largely Catholic country because I am met with disapproval or shock. People even tell me that I’m going to burn in hell if I don’t change.
I met my ex-boyfriend at a mutual friend’s party and we instantly clicked. He and I used to share the same philosophy about religion. Suddenly he changed when his born-again Christian cousin brought him to their church and he turned into this very conservative “spiritual” person. He used to believe that religion is the opium of the masses, but now he’s like a preacher telling me that we need God to be saved.
He broke up with me because I refused to change my beliefs. I want someone to love me for who I am. I don’t believe in changing for other people. It was very painful when he dumped me. Many said I need to have some kind of religion if I want to get married. If Christians, Catholics, Muslims have the right to believe in what they want to believe, what about me? Don’t I have the same right? Is it possible to find someone who is like me?
Pinay Atheist
Brava! Stand up for what you believe in. Don’t embarrass the value of the spine you have.
The word “dumped” was particularly indicative of how your boyfriend left you. Ouch. That obviously hurt! Your three years together clearly meant nothing. There was nothing there because it couldn’t hold you two together!
There are so many relationships that continue to flourish despite the differences in opinion, religion, financial standing, etc. Your boyfriend just became purer than pure and believes he’s now one of the chosen few holding the keys to heaven. You’re lucky to have escaped his holy orbit and can now resume being yourself again, regardless of what everybody else said. Whatever you believe in is between you and your Creator.
You are what you are. He has no right to overhaul your soul. Move on and stop pining for someone who has upended his feelings for you from his high horse.
Write to emarcelo@inquirer.com.ph.