‘Slim boyfriend’ jeans—why not? | Lifestyle.INQ

OCTOBER 27, 2022

Last year, I started cleaning out my closets, hoping in the end to de-clutter our entire 120-square-meter home, but I was somehow sidelined by something, I don’t remember what. I would have been done with it if only I had followed the Japanese Guru of Tidiness, Marie Kondo, author of “The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up”: Do it once and quickly.

 

I do believe her, because not heeding her advice is precisely why I have not succeeded yet. By some opposite force in me, I seem to insist on doing it little by little, one closet, one room at a time, and only whenever the spirit moves me. I have also rented bodega space, itself a form of cheating, in Ms Kondo’s book.

 

Her tidying methods are drastic; they must be done in one go, not by location but by categories. De-cluttering is a special and decisive event one plans for, and best done alone.

 

De-cluttering our bookshelves, Vergel did it precisely that way, decisively, in one go. I watched him lay all the books on the floor, as Ms Kondo instructs. He opened each book and breezed through some texts, recalling sentimental circumstances surrounding it: Bought on what inspiration? Given as a gift to us by whom? To each other? What might be memorable from it?

 

As surely Ms Kondo would have happily approved, Vergel gave each book a fitting farewell.

 

The remaining books were neatly categorized and placed back on the shelves, now with more breathing space between them. The shelves, of course, started filling up again; we are simply incorrigible book acquirers.

 

Last frontier

 

My closet is the last un-de-cluttered frontier in our home. Clothes are another matter to me. I wore them, and they have become part of who I once was and still am. I can’t seem to be as decisive as Vergel, who did it in no time.

 

He did have far fewer clothes, but, since he hasn’t really changed much in shape and weight, I still can’t imagine how he was able to decide what to keep or what to give away. Anyway, he ended up with nearly half.

 

Me, I put away some clothes almost every month, but, until I do it Ms Kondo’s way, I’ll never be done with it. My closets get overcrowded as I grow into the next size and the next. It shouldn’t be hard to tidy up, since I can’t wear many of them anyway. But once upon a time I looked good in them, and I have not lost hope of losing enough pounds to be able to squeeze myself back into them.

 

Before a recent trip, I looked in the pants section and discovered a number of jeans. I wondered if, like Vergel, I could do with a couple of pairs for 10 days. Last time, admittedly, I had brought too many clothes and shoes I didn’t get to wear.

 

Standing in front of my closet, I thought I might as well do some de-cluttering. I put all the jeans on the bed and started trying them one by one. This, by the way, is part of Ms Kondo’s recommended ritual before the final separation. I was crushed that I was unable to zip up any of them.

 

Zip trick

 

I remembered a trick a cousin of mine taught me, quite by accident, when I found her on her back on the floor of the ladies’ room of the Peninsula one night. I thought something had happened to her. “No,” she said with a laugh, “I’m just trying to zip up my jeans.”

 

It’s true—in that supine position, no matter how tight the jeans, the zipper closes somehow! It was the era when everybody wore jeans one size smaller. I don’t know how we survived that.

 

Anyway, when I was somehow able to zip up, I couldn’t get up! In the end, I folded the size 8s and 10s to give away, and hopefully kept the 12s. Then it dawned on me: Has the time come for a woman my age and size to stop wearing jeans? Surely, Vergel my fashion consultant would tell me.

 

He did. When we saw a sale at Marks & Spencer, he told me to buy one for our trip. So together we rummaged through the blue jeans section and he quickly picked a young style for me. The jeans’ style made us both crack up—“Slim Boyfriend.” The girl suggested a size 12, but I knew better. I took a 14.

 

How could I have thought it would be the last pair I would ever buy? I had no qualms wearing them sitting in a wheelchair at airports. I’ll have to make room for more jeans—they’re the best for trips!

 

Life-changing magic

 

Life at this age definitely requires simplifying and de-cluttering. I’m intrigued by the life-changing magic of tidying up, as Ms Kondo promises. Soon, we will be living only with possessions my husband and I use and love and treasure.

 

Everything else is clutter, which has no place in any happy, peaceful home, and even less, Ms Kondo says, in our inner state, where it matters most.

 

“When your room is clean and uncluttered, you have no choice but to examine your inner state. You can see issues you have been avoiding and are forced to deal with them. From the moment you start tidying up, you will be compelled to reset your life. As a result, your life will change. That’s why the task of putting your house in order should be done quickly. It allows you to confront the issues that are really important.”

 

Where was I?

 

 

 

 

 

 

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