Are we giving our children too much? | Lifestyle.INQ

OCTOBER 27, 2022

The fireworks that ushered in the New Year were stunning. But the smoke has not completely cleared. The Department of Health has issued statements about particles of debris from firecrackers still in the air. It is hard to breathe.

A stomach virus is making the rounds, an aftermath of the holidays. Viruses come alive when our resistance drops, making us vulnerable hosts.

For those whose energy level is still up, there’s a resolute move toward wellness. Gyms are booked solid.  There’s talk about “super” diets, Cohen’s amazing results and the sub-lingual drops available only in America, which allow you a scant 500 calories a day.

And when everything else fails, there are undergarments available that promise to make unsightly rolls disappear. Pray tell me, where do they go?  No matter, I hear that boutiques and specialty stores are running out of Spanx.

My doctor recommends exercise. I believe in gentle walking. The word “brisk” takes my breath away. I know that just thinking about it doesn’t help. But it’s a start.

Was Santa Claus nice to you last year? We had several “gift opening” parties. I had privileged seating; away from the tree, but close enough to watch the action.

Sparkle

There is nothing more beautiful than the sparkle in a child’s eyes as he opens a present. Expectation, anticipation and surprise!

Toys look stranger than ever. I was introduced to Optimus Prime, leader of the Autobots. For the heretofore uninformed, OP is a Transformer robot. He is this year’s big cheese, from what I hear.  I was totally mesmerized as I twisted, bent and spun its grotesque limbs. After I had totally messed him up, his little owner came to the rescue and gave me a look of exasperation.  I heard a couple of clicks and a few seconds later OP was back in business.

Right next to the tree was an array of the latest cell phones. I thought an Android was a man from outer space. There were BlackBerrys and Apples of the nonedible kind. Our family geeks informed me that the old laptops are too slow.  The latest ones are a couple of nanoseconds faster. No more double-click!

Thrilled as I was to be in the middle of all the excitement, my mind was full of questions.

Are we giving our children too much?

When we fulfill their fondest wishes, are we perhaps leaving them no room for deeper desires?

I worry about huge amounts of money spent to buy the latest hi-tech gadgets. Aren’t we overdoing it a bit?

What do children really need from us? Here are some obvious answers. Love. Discipline. Warmth. Time. Respect. Can’t find these in the store.

Have we taught them the difference between cost and value?

Do they know that what they want is not necessarily what they need?

How can we raise them with an appreciation for work when we leave them nothing to work for?

In today’s world of instant gratification, is there anything that can instill in them a passion for excellence?

How do we plant in their hearts a loathing for dishonesty?

Do we remind them that they are not the only inhabitants on this planet?

Do they know what it is like to “do without”?

These questions keep tugging at my heart and I struggle for answers.

Video games

I wonder, too, about the growing number of young people who live life glued to their video games. (We have provided those as well.) With their thumbs they control the figures on the screen, vicariously enjoying their power, unmoved by the sight of blood and totally detached from reality. What do they know about events that affect our country and even the world?

Do we dare pull the plug?

The other day, I found a refreshing blog written by a 20-year-old junior from East Carolina University. Christiane Sumilang Cordero is the star goalkeeper for the ECU Pirates, on a scholarship for Broadcast Journalism.

Here are excerpts from her most recent entry.

“We spend far too much of our lives standing in the background. Whether it be waiting, hoping, or working, we are constantly consumed with schedules, routines or taking things step by step by step.

“I can’t say it’s all bad, because staying within the lines has gotten me into college, where I play the game I love and have found a passion in journalism.  Both have opened doors for me to my future.

“The problem is that I’ve managed to do just about all of that while sitting ever so patiently as a wallflower. I have yet to do anything that has made me feel so incredibly alive that it pushed me to tears, or has made me realize who I am, or anything that has made me question in all honesty if I was alive.

“So this is my mission. I’m going on a journey in this glorious year of 2012 to declare myself. I will try 100 things that I have never, ever tried before.

“I have a ‘bucket list’ type category in my head that will serve as ideas (skydiving, voting in a presidential election, feeding a homeless person… to name a few), but most will be spontaneous. My goal is to try 1 to 3 things a week so that I’m constantly thinking and constantly open-minded about everything I see. I’m not exactly sure what I’ll get out of this, but the thought of not knowing is what drives me to explore it.”

To be honest, I can’t think of a hundred things I want to do. And no, I don’t wish to be 20 again. But age be damned, I can take a step forward and declare myself available. It is not too late to grab this year by the horns, or whatever it is the dragon wears.

I may no longer be in the mood (or shape) for sky diving, but certainly I can do something to make a difference.

All it takes is a little time, and a lot of heart. Thank God, I still have both.

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