I recently received the following email from a reader I will call Juliet:
Hi Jaime,
I feel so sad right now. In the 1980s, I met this 22-year-old boy when I was 20. It was love at first sight. We started visiting each other and were very close. It was very peaceful and lovely. We would visit each other in the morning and leave in the evening. No dull moment. We felt we would never separate. This lasted for five years. One day he visited me in my school and we had sex, and he never came back. I was so depressed and later heard that he got married.
I later got married, but have never been happy. Unfortunately, my husband has been treating me badly, and our marriage is empty. We have four kids, but there is no love. On Nov. 23, 2019, my old boyfriend popped up on my computer; his birthday is on my Facebook page. I communicated with him, and he answered me. He is happily married, with two kids. This, after 31 years. We resumed our relationship exactly the way it was then, but this time on social media. He told me that he wanted to marry me then, but his dad refused and told him we were third-generation cousins. He said he refused to go back to my school to tell me, because if he saw me again he would have defied his father’s wish. That was why he married another woman.We are now communicating again 24/7. I live in Canada, while he lives back home. I leaned that he is struggling to make both ends meet. He is a journalist and does not have a job right now, but is doing some side writing for small income. I felt bad for him and sent him money to start his own newspaper business. We do a live chat twice a week and talk for three to four hours, but it’s still not enough. Now he tells me he is very happy with his family. It is like his whole life is back. He is having a better relationship with his wife and children, while I feel so sad because the only thing I want is to be with him forever. It is like we connected again for me to help him get back to his family. Meanwhile, I feel so sad, as I will be moving out of my husband’s house, because he has abused me for the 28 years of our marriage.Please help me, what can I do? I am drained emotionally.Karma
Dear Juliet,
I wish to thank you for your trust and your interest in my work. However, I do not think I am the right person to give you advice on your emotional and relationship problem. I am neither a marriage counselor nor a psychologist. I am what is known in the West as a parapsychologist or a psychic researcher. I also do hypnotherapy counseling and past-life regression.
But what I can give you, perhaps, is some insight into why people meet and the problems that may arise because of such meetings. This explanation can only be understood or appreciated in relation to karma and reincarnation. Without these two concepts, any explanation is incomplete.
You must realize that we seldom meet a person by accident, for the soul never forgets. Every close relationship, whether it be positive or negative, has its roots in the previous lives of the persons involved. There is always a lesson we have to learn from those people, and in turn they have lessons to learn from us. Everyone we meet, therefore, is our teacher. The idea is for us to try to understand the lessons being taught to us by such relationship, what karma we need to resolve with that person in this lifetime.In my book ‘’Soulmates, Karma and Reincarnation’’ and in the seminar of the same title, I say, ‘’If you love somebody, let him go. If he comes back, he is yours. If he does not, he never was.’’
This is because, in the spiritual world, we never lose what is truly ours.
Secret of happiness
Another insight which might help you lessen your emotional burden comes from the great spiritual teacher, Buddha. According to him, ‘’The secret of happiness is not in having what you want, but in not wanting what you do not have.’’ This is the fundamental teaching of Buddhism, i.e non-attachment.
Think about these things that the ancient masters have taught us. Meditate on them. See what happens. Let me know.
I don’t know which part of Canada you are staying in. I know a good psychologist in Vancouver who may be able to help you. But he is very old and has retired from teaching at the University of British Columbia, where he was Professor Emeritus in Psychology. He is a well known hypnotherapist and does past life regression. You can try to look for him. Good luck. INQEmail
jaimetlicauco@yahoo.com