As the number of COVID cases continues to rise in the Philippines, I wonder: How much longer do we have to quarantine ourselves? Life has never been this unpredictable, mundane and quiet in my village. The world I once knew changed before my very eyes.
Never would I have imagined postgraduation life, my 20s, supposedly my prime years, to be this uneventful yet also eventful. Sitting with my thoughts and emotions, every morning, I find myself looking outside my window in an attempt to escape reality and the confines of my four blue bedroom walls.
Looking outside my window, I see thick clouds slowly traversing the sky covering and revealing the sun. At the forefront are trees teasing me as they sway against the dazzling sun and its piercing rays, calling me to walk on the empty streets of my village.
From time to time, I see butterflies of different shapes, sizes and colors fluttering by and hovering by my window. One particular butterfly amazed me because of the kaleidoscope-like pattern on its wings. This ethereal butterfly reflected streaks of purple and silver, and emanated my late grandmother’s aura—a calming and sovereign presence that only my senses could detect. My grandma made herself known to me.
Lola Ganda
When Lola Ganda (my term of endearment for my beautiful grandma) was still alive, she truly was the calm to my storm. The day before I left for my last semester at New York University in January 2020, she comforted me with pep talk and a warm hug: “Kate, we’ll never have to separate again once you complete your studies. You’ll be back in our arms before you know it. We’ll be together forever—only four months to go! Kaya mo ’yan! (You can do it!).”
She always knew what to say, and how to soothe my nerves. Little did I know that this would be the last time I’d see her.
A few days after my return on July 26 last year, her soul departed. It’s as if she waited for me to finish my mandatory hotel quarantine period and settle in back home before bidding adieu on Aug. 5. It was the darkest night of my life, and of all the members of the Santiago and Suarez families.
Amid all the uncertainties, one thing I became certain of is that I must make the most of my situation by sharing her remarkable life story with the world. I had to preserve her legacy for my sake and all those who love her dearly. I needed to confront grief directly and healthily. I decided to make art out of it, and turn grief into a meaningful gift for others.
The first person I consulted about my lola’s biography, my quarantine project of the year, was my former teacher, Ms Neni Cruz. Together, we created interview questions for family and relatives to shed light on the lesser-known parts of my grandma’s life. From there, we divided my grandmother’s story into chapters that highlighted major turning points of her life based on what I gathered.
Reliving her life
From January to August, I lived in my grandmother’s world, reliving the highs, lows and in-betweens of her life. Although it was an emotionally gruelling process, it was also cathartic and inspiring.
Because of this quarantine project, I even met new creatives like Jamie Bauza, the book designer. She helped bring my vision to life, and designed Lola’s book with a classy, romantic and regal aesthetic that embodies my grandmother’s character and rags-to-riches story very well. This book is my enduring labor of love, and a collaborative effort. I couldn’t be prouder of what we produced as a team: a collection of stories, tributes and images in honor of Lola.
How I wish Lola Ganda was still around, and that I could hand her the book personally and witness her priceless reaction. My grandma would have been overjoyed, but probably very timid about it too. She was not one to linger in the spotlight. In fact, she was always working behind the scenes, uplifting everyone at her own expense. She was simple and humble. All she cared about were the people around her. Now, it is her turn to be the star.
My grandmother’s story is no ordinary one. She had the golden touch. Her life is full of precious lessons that all can draw hope and inspiration from. Grateful for and inspired by the connections that sprung from writing and releasing Lola’s biography, I will be distributing my book on my blog and Bookshare, an e-library for individuals with reading difficulties, for free.
May the flow of these pages and my grandma’s extraordinary love move all the readers and direct their focus on all the good that can come out of this turbulent last year and a half.—CONTRIBUTED INQ