We hope you all had a meaningful Christmas, despite the calamity which rendered thousands of our countrymen homeless, foodless, workless and uncertain of what the future holds for them. We pray that all of us who were blessed to be spared by Typhoon “Odette” (internarional name: Rai) would find it in our hearts to assist our countrymen in need.
With many Filipinos, hope springs eternal, despite any predicament they’re in. The father of a family from Palawan who lost their house and means of livelihood was profuse with gratitude that none of them was hurt, and he beamed with optimism as he answered the broadcaster interviewing him.
If, in spite of negative things happening to us, we can still swim against the current and feed our minds with positive thoughts and emotions like hope, gratitude, love, compassion, humility, generosity, and the desire to share and help others though we need to be helped ourselves, then we can reap the benefits in terms of resilience, good health, happiness, peace of mind, enhancement of our personal lives and all forms of abundance from God’s bounty.
If there’s one important gift we could give ourselves this coming new year, it is to constantly practice positive self-talk on ourselves. And in good, as well as in bad things, to always remain grateful to the Lord.
Several years ago, after Supertyphoon “Yolanda” (Haiyan) hit Leyte, Manila Doctors Hospital and Metrobank Foundation organized a medical mission in Palo, Leyte. We met Remy and her son, who survived the killer typhoon and its 20-foot storm surge by clinging to an empty plastic water container. What was amazing in Remy was her positive outlook.
Even in her dire situation, she remained generous in sharing whatever relief goods they had with other family members and neighbors who had ran out of rations. Her positive thoughts of hope, gratitude, love and compassion for those in a similar situation kept her in a healthy and positive mental state, which was a key factor in their survival and recovery. We could only wish that all calamity victims can have the same frame of mind.
Change in mindset
Many of us don’t realize it, but we’re frequently talking to ourselves through our thoughts, and this self-talk can either be positive or negative, healthy or unhealthy. If we’ve been giving ourselves a lot of negative self-talk over the years, it’s never too late to change this, and the new year would be just as opportune a time as any to do it. This very moment is the best time to make that change in mindset happen.
Constantly remind yourself of God’s promise that He means us to prosper, give us a great future, and not to harm us, and you’ll see things changing within a week or two. Whenever we affirm our faith and trust in God, He’ll do just as He has assured us hundreds of times in the Bible—“Fear not!” He remains in full control, though the world seems to have spun out of its orbit and is headed for doom.
This pandemic has reinforced our negative default setting, that is, to expect worst-case scenarios, rather than hoping for the best. We’ve repeatedly written that the people actually determine how this pandemic will pan out in any country. It also depends on whether the people have a victor’s mindset, or a victim’s mindset. We visualize ourselves as the victor, overcoming the virus, and surely we’ll get our lives back on track and out of this pandemic.
Reducing negative self-talk can go a long way in reducing our stress level, more than any potent tranquilizer or sedative. Mental health has magnified into a major problem these days with the multifaceted stressor the virus has become.
Many authors have said that whatever circumstance in life we have right now is the result of the thoughts we’ve been nurturing in the past. So if we’re happy with our lives, that means we’ve been feeding ourselves with a lot of happy thoughts, and we should continue doing so.
On the other hand, if we’re not happy with our present lives, and we wish we could be healthier, sleep better at night, have better relationships and enjoy a little more abundance in life, then it can serve us well to change our thoughts. Our current circumstance does not define whether we’d be happy or not, but our current mindset does.
Dream big
When I was small, I remember my mother would tell us as the clock struck 12 on New Year’s Eve: “Happy thoughts, big dreams for the new year.” She taught us how to dream big, and believe in it, despite the odds. Indeed, the holy book tells us that even if we have a faith just as big as a mustard seed, we can move mountains, and cast them to the sea. The COVID mountain should not be any different. But only if we believe.
As we usher in the new year, I also remember Mang Sandro, whom we met while vacationing in Boracay more than 10 years ago. He was nearly 90 years old but he looked easily 10 years younger. He still had the spring in his step as he walked from one end of the beach to the other, selling knickknacks and cheap trinkets.
He looked very healthy for his age, but obviously he was not materially blessed. What was clear, though, was that he was full of joy and zest for life. He regaled the small crowd of people who gathered around him with tales of his small victories in life. We ended up buying some of the stuff he was selling.
His wife had long passed away, but he was enjoying a wonderful relationship with his children and grandchildren, and tried to contribute his share to buy food and pay for their house rental and utilities.
Cultivate gratitude
Mang Sandro was enjoying good health physically, mentally and spiritually. He said he spent the first several minutes after waking up each day thanking God for blessing him with another day to live. He made no long-term plans. He just planned what to do each day, trusting that God would provide for all his needs, and those of his family.
This attitude is similar to the epiphany an Italian octogenarian had when he was shown the bill for his monthslong hospital stay for critical COVID-19 complications. He was on high-flow oxygen therapy, and the oxygen alone amounted to tens of thousands of dollars.
He cried profusely, and when asked if it was due to his huge hospital bill, he replied, “No, it’s definitely not that … What I just realized was that God has been providing me with free air and oxygen for more than 80 years, and I never thanked him for it.”
Truly blessed are the grateful even for small things, because they will likely get much bigger blessings.
The importance of a positive mindset, as happy and healthy people like Mang Sandro would teach us, could not be exaggerated. If we fill our minds with negative thoughts day in and day out, the outcomes would likely be negative. We get sickness, failure, broken relationships and financial ruin. Negative thoughts can only attract negative things; they’re not capable of attracting positive outcomes.
The reverse happens if we constantly fill our minds with positive thoughts and feelings like good health, abundance, love, compassion, gratefulness, and a desire to help and share. We’ll likely get more of these in return.
We know it’s easier said than done, but the truth is, our thoughts ultimately determine what kind of health, relationships and state of life we have from hereon. And if we badly need some changes in the life we have, we just have to make an effort to change our mindset.
Around five years ago, when we vacationed again in Boracay, the familiar figure of Mang Sandro with his box of trinkets was no longer there. We were told that he died a couple of years before, probably due to old age. We wished he was still there to regale us with his stories, and tell us more of his secrets to a happy and meaningful life.
May the spirit of Mang Sandro’s cheerful and grateful heart fill our hearts, too, and banish all the uncertainties COVID brings, in this new year. INQ