When will my life begin?


This year, I’ve proclaimed myself a Disney Princess. It’s not the looks, the voice, or the adventure of a lifetime that supported my conclusion. Funnily enough, it was isolation. This year gave me much in common with one of my favorites, Rapunzel. She’s kept away from the coronavirus and has to stay inside while everyone else gets to go out. Bonus: She has brown hair at the end of the movie. I’ve ticked off the important boxes.

My family is filled with germaphobes and we have a crippling fear of the virus. Despite the majority of the population being vaccinated, we have yet to outgrow staying indoors at all times.

Quite frankly, days are spent like a loop—stuck in the same day, every day. Like Rapunzel.

I can schedule all I want or plan my days by the hour with something new each time. However, life itself didn’t feel real anymore. It was normal to stay at home in 2020—but 2022? I’m missing out on everything others can finally have a taste of.

When will my life begin?

That was how the start of 2022 felt. It was those very thoughts that swirled in my head and created rainstorms. It took some time but at last, I saw the light.

Reason for being

In my search to still feel like a part of the living, I’ve stumbled into a rabbit hole of activities that an average Google search couldn’t even recommend. Without looking, I wouldn’t have finally figured out my dream in life—to seek justice for those who do not have the strength to fight for themselves. To speak for the mute, to fight for the weak and to defend the defenseless.

I have come to realize that only in silence do we notice the little things. The ocean’s waves have to be calm so that we can discern the crickets’ melody as we walk along a sandy shore. Only if we look hard enough, do we see the true meaning of the butterfly effect. Silence is like a cloth that polishes our eyes spotless, so that we can see the depth and value of people, situations and life itself.

The quiet is where I realized that the answers have been there all along. I was too busy with the rush of life or shouting at the sky for answers to see that it was right there in plain sight.

Only in silence can we hear the voice of God.

I’ve finally got a dream, and without every extra second I spent at home—maybe I would have never realized that. I’m still exploring the small rabbit hole, my future seeming brighter and brighter with each tricking minute of alone time I get.

As uninteresting as it may seem at first, staying at home helped me realize the kind of person I want to be.

—CONTRIBUTED

 

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