DEAR EMILY,
I’m just curious. Is it ok to have an affair with a married man if the reason is you love each other? This is different from the case of the married woman who used her affair with her married friend as a crutch.
I fell in love with a classmate in high school who is now married. He said he loved me in high school and found out that he still does after we met, many years without contact.
L
Is this a rhetorical question or are you just casing the joint? Could it be possible it is a done deal already? You never mentioned whether you’re married yourself.
Doesn’t the Bible say you’ve already sinned just thinking about it? Quite the same as saying, “if you can think it, you can do it.”
It’s not as simple as all that really, not exactly plain black and white, or an open and shut case. First, now that he’s still in love with you after all these years, what now? Are you going to open your veins to each other because the feeling is mutual? And after you go over the hump, will it be an “afternoon delight” sort of thing? Second, what if it gets serious later on, will you leave both your families and run into the sunset?
If, indeed, you’re married, too, are you having “thoughts” because of your unhappiness with your husband, because he is cruel, or a womanizer, or as exciting as a frozen fish in bed? Could you be just plain bored?
Why did you two break up and marry other people if you were so in love with each other? There must have been factors serious enough to turn your backs from each other and dissipate a future together.
Think twice, thrice, many times before you jump. Flirting is so much different from living with each other 24/7. But if giving in to these “smoldering embers” will make you better persons, that is, make you love and appreciate your own families more, who are we mere mortals to judge? This might solve and cure you of rending questions such as the “what could have beens” and “what ifs” once and for all.
Why allow the whole house to burn down when the flames that may have already eaten up the welcome mat be stopped completely from even scarring the entrance door?
E-mail the author at emarcelo@inquirer. com.ph or [email protected]; Subject: Lifestyle.
