This 2020, my body clock is FUBAR’D (fucked up beyond all recognition).
I do fairly well with my work-life balance pre-pandemic. Now that we’re balls deep into our new normal, seeking time for ourselves is a fallacy. The line is so blurred between work and personal life that I gave up understanding it.
The only times I have for myself are between 12 a.m. and 4 a.m. In my new normal, these are my downtime hours. I delay my time for sleep to do shit I actually want to do. You know, entertain interests or veg out and binge Try Guys on Youtube.
I thought I was the only one experiencing this. Turns out, there’s a name for this phenomenon that’s not insomnia: revenge bedtime procrastination.
What is revenge bedtime procrastination? Apparently in 2014, a paper from Utrecht University’s Department of Clinical and Health Psychology coined the term “bedtime procrastination,” or the act of not sleeping on time without a reason to do so. Chinese social media added the word “revenge” this 2020, giving birth to its new super relatable meaning.
“[It’s] a phenomenon in which people who don’t have much control over their daytime life refuse to sleep early in order to regain some sense of freedom during late-night hours,” tweets journalist Daphne K. Lee. “Then there are post-covid ‘revenge buying’ and ‘revenge saving’—everything we do is a revenge nowadays because of our constantly exacerbated rage.”
At a time when we could all die tomorrow (dark, I know), the little pleasures in life are starting to get unconventional. This might just be your average insomnia if we’re in 2019 but in 2020, delaying your sleeping hours becomes an underrated form of self-care.
Vice argues this phenomenon isn’t about sitting on our bed and getting swallowed into an internet K-hole. In their article, they wrote: “It’s a time to be alive and live on my own terms and take joy in the hours of being me.” This is a lot of people’s new treat yourself mindset, I suppose.
So if you’re paranoid that your body clock is in shambles, you’re probably just fine. This is a reaction to our plague year. In our plague year, we sacrifice our sleeping schedule to take care of ourselves.
Isn’t that fucked up? That’s 2020 for you.
Read more:
Treat yo self with this hyperspecific guide for your self-care needs
Self-care goes beyond face masks and bath bombs
Check out these friendly self-care reminders for your emotional well-being
Art by Yel Sayo