DEAR EMILY,

I recently learned that my friends of more than two years are not really my friends. They told me themselves that they really don’t see me as a friend;  that they can’t be friends with me and that they only go out with me because it’s always my treat.

They said they find me very irritating because I am so makulit and clingy. I am makulit because it’s my nature. I repeatedly ask about things just to be sure. I am clingy because this is how I show my friends how much I care for them.

I am four years older than them—I’m 23 and they are 19-year-old college girls. They were classmates of my cousin who has transferred to a different school. I am really depressed to know that the bonding we had, the laughs we shared and everything are all nothing to them.

Is age gap really a factor in friendship? Is it bad to be makulit? Is it bad to be clingy with your friends?

MR. LOVING HANDS

You are almost a generation older than these girls. Shouldn’t you have the wisdom to analyze why they’re treating you this way? You were already in high school when most of them were probably still wetting in bed!

Clearly, you’re someone they can’t help but wrinkle their noses at. Instead of being hurt by their infantile attitude, why not be thankful for their honesty and reconsider the overall picture?

Due probably to their limited vocabulary, they can only describe you as “makulit” or “clingy.”  Have you forgotten how icky grownups are to youngsters? Just ask any parent of a teenager. They think they know it all, they have their own rules and only their views are acceptable to them. They are territorial and clique-ish. Except for your cousin who had gone away, you probably have virtually nothing in common with them.

Give them time to mature mentally. They may look and act like grown-up women, but you know now they are just kids mimicking adults. Give them time. And start looking for people your own size, and your own age. You probably have to grow up yourself!

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