DEAR Emily,

I am torn between passion and money. I am a 2011 BS Development Communication graduate from a branch of a top university in the province. I have already switched jobs three times since then.

In college, my passion was in the performing arts. I love singing, hosting, dancing and acting, but I was never allowed to study in Manila and take up the arts because my parents were afraid of the influence a big city would have on me. So here I am, doing office work which is the wrong job for me.

I am currently doing part-time event hosting and singing, and hosting weddings and other occasions. I rarely get bookings because I only post my availability online. That can’t be counted as a stable career.

I tried auditioning as well for Hong Kong Disneyland. My problem is I don’t have formal experience or education relating to theater.

I’m just tired of sitting every day in the office, feeling the agony of waking up at 7 a.m. and waiting for my 9-6 day job to end. My only motivation to work is the salary. I know I am being immature and selfish because I still have two siblings going to college, and I should be helping my mother with the expenses.

I am already 25 and should be able to find a stable job by now. I am also thinking about my own future, the career that I really want to be in. I can’t imagine myself doing exactly the same routine in this desk job till I’m 60. I’m bored with my life and I want a break, but I can’t because of my family commitment.

Other people’s dreams are so easy to achieve, like being an accountant, a doctor, a writer or a teacher. My dream of becoming an actress and singer is so hard to achieve. I am also not as beautiful as a mestiza like those Fil-Ams or Fil-Aussies who always get a shot at ABS-CBN or GMA’s pool of talents. But hosting, singing and acting are the things I do best and where I think I will excel in.

JANINE

Do you really believe that the dreams of writers, accountants and doctors are easy to achieve? How sure are you that they themselves are happy at what they’re doing presently?

There are doctors who have shifted to writing or carpentry; also, a mathematician turned musician, architect turned chef, dentist turned pilot and many more who have pursued their dreams in the middle of their career. You’re not alone in your frustration.

It’s normal to feel impatient and depressed at how slowly the days unfold and not realizing those dreams in a snap. But you’re not helping yourself any if, at only 25, you’re already imagining a horrible life at 60.

Trouble is, the life you’re craving for involves having to push yourself up in a forest of people who are themselves desperate for that very limited space in the limelight!

If you believe you are truly exceptional, and not only good, refrain from comparing yourself with those fair-skinned women’s images plastered on billboards. That’s too skin-deep. You don’t know the troubles they’re having. And in the end, however you look, beauty is still in the eyes of the beholder.

Keep on honing your talent. Make yourself better. Take formal singing lessons to gain more confidence for your craft—not just karaoke-ready. Audition for gigs in a nice hotel for the chance to sing a few times a week. Be discovered.

Do you read enough books that’ll make you speak and think sensibly? How is your sense of humor? As a host, how interesting are you at holding the attention of an audience? Do people other than you or your family think you’re good as well? Think big but start small.

If you can’t control what happens to you, control how you feel about it then. Difficult, but a helpful reminder. Life is a marathon, not a sprint. It is lived one step at a time.

E-mail the author at [email protected] or [email protected]