Dear Emily,
I got married when I was stupid and very young, and am single again. I was not able to finish college, but now I’m working in a restaurant.
Since I am always broke, a friend told me of a couple who wanted a child, but couldn’t conceive. The wife, who is older than the man by 35 years, was his professor in college. She was married once and never had kids. She actually wanted the child more for her young husband than for her. She was worried she’d be too old to enjoy a child if they waited much longer.
I was recommended to be the surrogate mother, and I agreed—for the money. So as not to spend a fortune on a medical process like in vitro, I suggested to them to do it naturally with me—for a fee. Everyone agreed, especially the wife who thought it was going to be money well spent.
We signed contracts, etc. After delivery, I thought that was the end of my relationship with them.
The husband called a year later and asked to visit me and update me with what’s happening with the child. He asked if I was willing to take care of the child in their home, as the wife had suggested it. She was discovered to have a recurring ailment and wanted the child cared for.
They are a caring couple and I was drawn to their kindness. It wasn’t long before the husband and I started a relationship.
Whether the wife approved of it or not, I couldn’t know. But we all acted like a family together. The husband and I have been very discreet as we didn’t want to create any unhappiness with his wife. They themselves are happy with my child and that’s good.
Does anyone need to know the truth?
Ruth
Stuff happens just when you’re trying to move on in life.
This scenario may only happen in fiction, but we know that fact is much stranger than that. The wife in this case is selfless and truly loves her husband. How else can she stand by quietly and not know that there’s something going on in plain sight?
A wife’s intuition is unbelievably razor-sharp. You and the husband may be discreet or quiet as a clam, but she could have planned this herself because of her illness and her advancing age.
Granting that the wife is privy to this “little” affair of yours with the husband, it’ll surely still hurt a bit if the two of you were too open with your relationship. The upside, if you can call it that, is you’re accepted by her.
Be kind to her in return and treat her gently as you would a truly valuable but ailing dear friend. What she’d need at this time is a happy environment full of the good stuff—laughter, kindness, and people she feels are loyal to her.
She must have liked you to begin with. So, despite your quiet relationship with her husband, show your gratitude to her by never ever making her feel left out.
She was a gift to you from the heavens, having opened up this whole new loving environment for you. Let it be the little secret of your little family.
