Your mantra for the week: “As I love myself, I find myself loving others more.”
My column last week, “How to love yourself: Leave unhappy relationships,” went a-trending. I presume there are many existing unhappy relationships that are being tolerated for one reason or another. In IAMISM, it’s an indication that people do not love themselves enough.
Some of their excuses: “It’s for the sake of the children,” which is really no excuse at all, since children do know when their parents are unhappy, and would be happier if they separate and become friends instead.
“How will I support myself?” some wives worry. Which is why, in IAMISM, I recommend that before marriage, one should be self-sufficient.
Another common reason is, “What would people say”—which is the lamest of excuses because other people have nothing to do with your relationships, unless you allow their views and opinions to influence you.
Then, “there is the question of morality.” But morality changes with the times. A wife recently said, “My husband is so faithful, I wish he would fool around.” Today there is evidence that more people are living-in happily, with no matrimonial contracts. If one is needed, I suggest a contract duly notarized between the two people involved, whether straight or gay, stipulating what they expect from each other and from their union, with a clause that the agreement could be rescinded or ended by mutual consent—no more need for annulments or even divorce, if it is ever legalized.
But, I must admit that there are marriages made in heaven. My brother Louie has been married to his wife Patricia for 54 years. As they say, there will always be one in the family.
Recently at Sala Bistro, where no pictures were taken, two pretty and talented jewelers, Yen Guevara and Jane Sy, hosted an intimate dinner.
They talked about their latest designs and travel adventures with good friend Duday Tuason, who happens to be a jewelry aficionado. Her collection would be the marvel of many women, with no objections from her husband, Noel, because they have made a marriage compact that has kept their union harmonious, that there would always be a division of labor: He would make the money and she would spend it efficiently.
Yen and Jane show and sell their exquisite creations at Lanero, Greenhills Shopping Center. But they can attend to clients in their own homes. Arnel Patawaran, who was a guest, talked about his book launch next month. He does come up with original perspectives and unique angles in his writings—wala siyang patawad!
Mario Katigbak, an events expert, agreed to help out in Arnel’s book launch. It’s a guarantee that the event would be a total success.
I marvel at how easy it is for Ilocos Norte Gov. Imee Marcos to say that martial law was just a conflict between the Marcoses and the Aquinos, just a simple family feud. Wow, and I thought all these years that she was the most intelligent among her siblings. I stand corrected—it is probably Irene who is really the most intelligent and most decent of the three.
Imee must be reminded that what she calls a feud cost the country $34 billion which, to this day, every Filipino is paying for and has only succeeded in paying for the interest of the Marcos loot.
I want to remind Imee that in 1986, when the Philippines was considered the “Sick Man of Asia,” she and the Marcoses went into exile in Hawaii, each of the 55 million Filipinos then, including newborns, owed $618 to the International Monetary Fund and other lending institutions. Yet, the Marcoses have denied any wrongdoing despite all the evidence that has been produced to prove their kleptocracy.
One proof is that the Human Rights Victims’ Claims Board (HRCVB) paid me as reparation for my illegal detention upon the declaration of martial law. If the remaining Marcoses would ever get back in Malacañang, they would insist that Ninoy Aquino was not assassinated, but actually committed suicide on the tarmac. That is how delusionary they have become.
I wish every Filipino would read Primitivo Mijares’ book, “The Conjugal Dictatorship of Ferdinand and Imelda Marcos,” which led to the author’s unexplained disappearance, no trace of his remains to this day.
Back to Imee and moving on, why doesn’t she ask the people whose human rights were violated during the reign of her dictatorial parents? I cannot fathom how she can compare the abuses of martial law to a family feud and that we must move on from there, just as she easily did after separating from Tommy Manotoc.
Now I know why many politicians end up as kleptocrats—with the money they accumulate, they can effortlessly revise even history.
Recently, Imee was even able to convince University of the Philippines president Danilo Concepcion to hold a reunion of the Kabataang Barangay (KB) at the hallowed and activist grounds of my alma matter.
And why not? After all, he was president of the KB Federation in Metro Manila from 1976-78, and everyone knows that whoever bowed to the will of the Marcoses benefited exceedingly.
“Tao lang po,” he wrote online an apology and explanation to offended UP folk. He even went as far as saying that he would “never forget the dark period of our country during the martial law years.” But just one call from Imee, he totally FORGOT!
E-mail the columnist: [email protected] Catch him live in his lectures on IAMISM every Sunday, 7 p.m., on his Facebook page.