Dear Emily,
My older brother, who hasn’t asked any advice from me, ever, suddenly opened up about his relationship with a woman. They were office mates once, but became close friends, and, finally, lovers. While the relationship is sexually rewarding, he just realizes how much money he spends on her. There is always something she needs to buy, always a reason to ask money from him. He finds he cannot continue at this rate and wants out. But he does not want to hurt her feelings, as he thinks they are OK with each other. It’s just the money that bothers him. He doesn’t know how to tell her because he’s worried the woman would not accept a breakup and make life tough for him. She is keeping the affair from her husband, too. Of course, she may plead for him to stay with her. What can he do? – Concerned Bro
This only proves that despite the sordid tales of “love gone wrong among sugar daddies,” men never really learn their lessons. And it is still continuing till now.
I am positive your brother is a family man with an older wife, children and grandkids around him. She cannot make his life any more difficult, were he to turn the tables on her.
How needy is your brother’s paramour that she has made your brother her sugar daddy? Is her husband unemployed?
What started probably with trysts in nice hotels, dinners in grand surroundings, fancy trips in faraway romantic places has taught this woman the life of leisure from a very good teacher—your brother! She probably felt, “Why not milk this generous old fool” and see how far she can go?
He can alter this financial arrangement all at once by telling it to her face that the well has dried up. Or he can suggest a monthly allowance, if she will allow a set figure. He can also start tightening his wallet and utter the one word she’s not heard from him: “No!”
But since you said he enjoys sex with her, then, he must not complain and consider it payment for her services. If he is already at a certain age, how many more years can his body truly enjoy sex before he starts getting impotent or, God forbid, bedridden?
Or he can just go as far as his finances are able to sate this indulgence. Life is short.
As they say, “There’s no free lunch.” Accept that she is his lunch.
