(Third in a series)
Reading books, playing games
Reapearl Cervantes
Mom of Chloe, 10
How has your lockdown experience been with your kid? How do you manage her?
It was a breeze, because I’ve been working from home since 2009. Chloe’s used to seeing me work, and she knows when she has to stay out of the room and when to approach me if she needs something. I understand the experiences of other parents with babies and toddlers who had to work from home due to the pandemic, because I’ve been there years ago and it was a struggle.
How do you keep her from getting bored?
Chloe loves reading books, and we were able to buy a lot from the Big Bad Wolf sale in February and Manila International Book Fair last year, so she didn’t run out of titles to read. She finally understands why I love “The Baby-Sitters Club” and “Nancy Drew.” My husband also encouraged her to play Animal Crossing and Pokemon so they’d have something to do together.
Has being in quarantine together brought you closer?
Yes, but it can get crazy. Kids go hungry every 30 minutes.
What have been your favorite things to do with them in lockdown?
We watched a lot of movies and shows in Netflix.
Have you imposed a schedule or structure on her days?
Yes, but we’re not strict about it. Before playing Animal Crossing, Pokemon or NatGeo’s Animal Jam, she has to answer some pages from the workbooks I bought for her. My brother, who’s a pedia resident, told us that she also has to answer some math problems and to read books. I encouraged her to draw or to write stuff in her journal. She’s only allowed to use her phone for two hours daily.
What has been the biggest challenge of being in lockdown with your kid?
I think it’s more of how kids are dealing with this mentally and emotionally. Chloe misses her friends. She misses her old routine of going to school and attending her Eye Level sessions. We have to make sure that she doesn’t feel so sad about staying home since March. She wasn’t able to say goodbye to some of her friends who enrolled in other schools this school year. Thankfully, classes in FEU (Far Eastern University) Cavite started last week, so she gets to interact with her friends and teachers again.
What’s the best part of being in lockdown with them?
It would have to be spending every minute of every day with our daughter and following a schedule for her. It’s fun not having to worry about what time the school service would pick her up the next day or what she’ll eat for lunch at school. Honestly, it’s also challenging having to answer a lot of questions and to keep an eye on her while she’s answering her worksheets and reading, but she’ll grow up and this won’t be forever. I know we have to enjoy this moment.
Janice Villanueva
Mom of Coby, 23, Zach, 21, and Reese, 14
How has your lockdown experience been with your kids?
Our family moved to Canada the day before Manila locked down. When we landed in our new city, we were asked to go on self-quarantine after we purchased groceries. The initial 14 days ended up becoming a four-month quarantine.
My kids are grown. We are a pretty bonded family, so lockdown has been a natural bonding time for us. Days flowed smoothly, our interactions grew relaxed and natural, even newly assigned chores at home were surprisingly quite smooth and organized, with each child assigned chores, while my husband and I did our share. Lockdown plus immigration experience was a blessing as we had been given forced time to stay home, and that wasn’t really a problem for us since we can survive with just each other, doing things individually and together.
I would say being on quarantine in Canada made us appreciate each other more, appreciate our family, how we can be ourselves, and realizing that what really matters in life is that we are together.
How do you manage them?
The first two months, we let them be. They did what they wanted, slept when they wanted, even if it ended up being all of us on Philippine time and our neighbors wondering why we were doing laundry at 3 a.m. and cooking “midnight snacks” almost every night. We let it be because their friends from Manila were all online, and this broke the possible separation anxiety and homesickness of being away from home those first few months. By early June, we started working on looking for schools for our two younger ones, and gave our eldest a month to discern if he wanted to take further studies or work by fall. Other than that, we really let them be, as we felt that the stress of the pandemic, plus leaving their old lives for a new one at the same time, were enough pressures to deal with.
How do you keep them from getting bored?
Our children never really get bored. They each have activities they are into. And when they take breaks, they get together, the three of them, and have their own bonding time. Occasionally, we have family time, too—play card games, go on a quick visit to the supermarket, or when it opened, the nearby beach or to the riverside here to get sun and fresh air.
Has being in quarantine together brought you closer?
Most definitely. My husband and I are closer; we had rough days, like getting on each other’s nerves, which was normal. Other than that, we learned to have a flow, manage expectations. We learned to be more understanding and patient since we were all navigating a “new way of living”—pandemic life and Canadian life.
I even called us “newbies at life” and this called for more understanding and compassion with each other. I love that the kids can count on each other and that they never fight! As a family, I have been thanking God for allowing us to just be simply happy, just enjoying everyday moments together and supporting each other with this major life transition.
What have been your favorite things to do with them in lockdown?
Playing games together, hearing virtual mass together, having our meals, doing chores on rotation, assembling furniture together and getting to know our new city together as we explore the sights.
We were also into the pandemic trends as in Manila—cutting their hair, doing TikTok, tending to the plants and raking leaves in our backyard, cooking new dishes. We even recently started trying working out together as a family too!
Have you imposed a schedule or structure to their days?
No, not really, but will have to do that soon when classes start in the fall (September). We don’t know yet if it will be online or face to face; either way we will need to get their body clocks finally adjusted to Canada time.
What has been the biggest challenge of being in lockdown with your kids?
Essentially, it is having our supposed “new life” on hold. We have been thinking that if there was no COVID-19 (new coronavirus disease), our life after landing would have been so different. Kids would have been in school right away. My husband and son would probably be working right way and I’d be running the household virtually on my own as I run our businesses in Manila from here. Having a slow start, or even a pause, in our new life, not even being able to meet any new people here, having the kids home and their lives as either student or early career people on hold was a challenge to my being a planner. So I learned to let go and take things as they are, focus on being grateful and take it day by day.
What’s the best part of being in lockdown with them?
Honestly, just having them around is a blessing. By this age they would have been always out with friends or busy pursuing their careers and school, but the past four months have been heaven for me, the “clingy mom.” I wish it were through different circumstances, but I am grateful for this time of togetherness, and trying to just make the most of it while it’s there. INQ
