I am a 37-year-old man, and my wife of three years and I have separated because of her infidelity.
My friend saw her in a restaurant with a man who acted intimate with her. My friend took pictures. I confronted her and she admitted to having an affair for several months before they were caught. She said she wasn’t happy with me anymore. She was tired of our “average” lifestyle and wanted more, and found a man who gave her everything she wanted: money, jewelry, expensive steak dinners, great sex, etc. I was crushed. I was a good husband. I’m not rich, but I’m hardworking, though I couldn’t buy the fancy things she wanted. We couldn’t start a family until we had saved enough money.
She left me for her rich lover and cut off communication with me since November. This February, she contacted me out of the blue asking me to meet with her. She said that her lover kicked her out of their house because his legal wife had returned home from abroad with their kids. He didn’t want them to know about her.
She begged me to take her back since she didn’t have anywhere to go. I was all set to file for an annulment, but when the government announced the Luzon-wide coronavirus lockdown, I decided to let her stay with me until this pandemic ended.
After a long discussion, she repented and asked me to forgive her. I love her and agreed to start over again with her. When I told my family about my decision, they said I am stupid and that she’ll probably cheat on me again once this quarantine is over.
Am I doing the right thing?
—HUSBAND UNDER QUARANTINE
You’re 37 and it’s only you who can decide what to do with your life. But your family preempting that your wife will probably cheat again is like saying they know exactly what will happen tomorrow. Nobody can foretell the future. Did anybody foresee the coming of this pandemic that was going to afflict the whole world?
So better live your life the best way you can, and just hope for the best.
Your wife should have learned her lesson by now. If she had any self-respect, the humiliation of being kicked out by this man, who didn’t want his family to even know about her, should be enough embarrassment and shame to make her crawl underground! And her audacity to run back to you to give her a roof over her head!
The glitter and great sex she left you for must now look so irrelevant compared to what’s happening to her now. If, after this pandemonium is over, she goes back to her old ways, she’d be no better than the proverbial snake in the grass. You can then go to your parents and bring a big humble pie.