HE initially thought gender equality can be attained by merely putting a slash and a “she” next to the word “he” in the laws being drafted in Congress.

But Donald Caballero, a staff member at the House of Representatives’ committee on revision of laws, realized that it was more complicated than that.

Most of the measures and laws passed in the last 10 years to help prevent violence against women (VAW) and end gender-based discrimination are focused on the women as victims and survivors. Overlooked in the whole equation are the perpetrators of violence – the men.

Police statistics show that 90 percent of VAW offenders are men, Caballero said.

If things were to change, these offenders should be transformed into advocates in the campaign to end VAW, according to the National Commission on Women (NCW).

In 2006, the commission organized a gathering to start the process of ending this cycle. Caballero was one of the men who attended the event that later gave birth to the organization Men Opposed to Violence Against Women Everywhere (Move).

Formed to “generate a critical mass of men advocating humane gender-sensitive values and practices in which girls, boys, women and men together build cultures and communities of peace, security and equality in gender relations,” Move has since been giving gender sensitive seminars, workshops and training courses to men and boys all over the country.

“When we are invited to conduct a Move orientation, we emphasize that there is a need to involve men in the elimination of VAW,” Caballero said. “Men may be the primary perpetrators of VAW, but they are also a major part of the solution,” he added.

“From there, we ask them if they are willing to be members,” he continued. Certain qualifications, like good moral character, must be met. “We prefer men of principles, loving, caring and most of all, respectful of women.”

If they meet the qualifications and agree with the principles, they are asked to pledge to three things: Not to commit VAW, not to condone VAW and and not to remain silent in the face of VAW.

To fast track the organizing, the group starts with the frontliners in providing services – social workers, village officials, community workers, policemen, lawyers, the religious, legislators, teachers. Young boys below 18 are considered as associate members.

“The moment they recognize the value of gender sensitivity, these service providers will have a different perspective in handling VAW cases [that] will also affect their relations with their partners and children,” Caballero said.

At first, the people appeared reluctant to join Move’s activities, he recounted. The group was perceived to be anti-male, biased for women and engaged in the battle of the sexes. But as the members explain gender relations, the men “come to realize that it is only society that dictates who we are.”

The men who have attended their seminars also realize the principle of shared power and responsibility between women and men at home, in the workplace and in the wider national and international communities, said Caballero. They come to appreciate as well the principle of equality between women and men as integral to the socialization process.

“They then ask for more gender deepening sessions and training on how to eliminate VAW and give positive roles and responsibilities to men to attain gender equality,” the Move leader added.

Move’s activities have attracted support from prominent Filipinos and traditional male bastions such as the Armed Forces of the Philippines, the Philippine National Police and the Department of National Defense.

Among the men who have publicly supported Move’s advocacy against VAW are Local Governments Secretary Jesse Robredo, Senator Franklin M. Drilon, former Chief Justice Hilario G. Davide, Jr., former senator Aquilino Pimentel Jr. and former vice president Noli De Castro.

As of last count, Move has at least 5,000 active members in 27 chapters nationwide, according to Jonathan Pascual, secretary and membership committee chairman. Move Chapters in Aklan, Quezon, Sultan Kudarat and other provinces have been organized, including those at the village level.

The group has also linked up with international movements such as the White Ribbon Campaign and men’s organizations in Thailand, Cambodia, Mongolia and others.

Achieving gender equality and ending violence against women and girls require a concerted effort, Caballero said. Both can be attained when men and women work together in partnership.

But despite initial enthusiasm about it, the group remains on the sidelines, the Move leader admitted. Today, five years after the group was formed, the idea of “men talking with other men about VAW remains a novelty.”

Its Facebook account, which describes the group as composed of “caring, pro-active and principled men who are dedicated to the cause of making the Philippines free from VAW,” has only 55 friends.

But Caballero remains hopeful despite this dismal figure. All they need, he said, is a support group. It’s not enough for men to get together over drinks and pour out their woes; they need other men to help them keep the spirit of preventing VAW alive, he says. •