To live independently is a wish that may have crossed many teen minds. It’s a sign of being grownup––but it’s not as easy as it may seem.
For students from the provinces attending school in Manila or for students whose school is on the other side of the traffic-clogged metropolis, living away from home is a rite of passage. It has its thrills, heartaches and personal challenges.
Don Dilidili, a University of the Philippines Geography major and veteran dormer, who over time has resided in Kalayaan, Molave, Ipil, and Centennial dorms inside the UP campus, considered meeting fellow dormers a way to expand his social circles. “It’s fun to meet students from other colleges and learn something new, and not just pure academics.”
He adds, “Having no parents around” is one of the perks of his dorm experience.
Cousins Bea de Jesus and Trisha Javelosa, Management Honors and Management Engineering students from Ateneo, recommend “dorming in” with someone you know. “We’re cousins so we’re comfortable with each other,” says De Jesus.
“Unlike my friend, who is also from the south, who doesn’t like her roommate. She always goes home or she sleeps over at our other friends’ dorms,” she continues.
They have no problem sharing the space in a dorm along Katipunan. They decorated their space by putting pictures all over, and Post-Its so they never miss a reminder.
Javelosa’s dad in particular chose this dorm because of the security it provided. “There is a biometric scanner on every floor to make sure not just anyone can enter. The security call the rooms a little before 10 p.m. to make sure everyone is accounted for,” she says.
One thing that differentiates dorm life from being in a rented condominium unit is that their dorm has a curfew. “You have to tell them in advance if you will be coming in late,” says De Jesus.
Cohabitation adjustments
Cohabitation with other people also means setting aside your previous notions of personal space and learning to adjust to others’ idiosyncrasies. Javelosa is a night person and sleeps late, while De Jesus does not mind sleeping with the lights on. They’ve scheduled bathroom time to make sure they get to their classes early.
In Dilidili’s case, privacy or the idea of sharing space with guys is not much of an issue. He’s all praises for living on campus: “I can wake up 15 minutes before my class and go back to my dorm in between classes to sleep. If I forgot anything, I can easily get it without much effort, compared to when I was living outside campus.”
On the other hand, Javelosa, who initially stayed in a dorm inside the campus, felt trapped living inside the campus grounds. She believes “home” should always be separated from her school life, and living on campus makes it impossible to do so.
Whether or not these dormers agree that living in dorms is actually a good thing, it is inevitable that you pick up a lesson or two, while being away from the comforts of home. Dilidili has learned to budget his money properly, making sure his allowance can cover the whole week. Javelosa can now wake up with an alarm clock, something she was not able to do before, because her mother always woke her up at their home in Iloilo.
Independence and self-discipline are the lessons that struck De Jesus. She says, “No one is around to tell you what to do.” They have experienced life on their own far earlier than they should, but in doing so they have learned to stand on their own feet.
The dorm life might sound appealing, especially to those who sometimes want to escape from their parents, but it could also mean eating alone, doing your own chores, or having no one to talk to about how your day went at night. Living the dorm life is not so easy, but for these students, it has worked.
