Let’s do a little “getting to know myself” exercise.

In the wake of Valentine’s Day, if you are still searching for mister or miss right in your life, it won’t happen until you are ready.

So, Step 1 is to understand yourself a little better. Everyone searches for perfection in their lives. And yet, often, the pursuit of perfectionism is more than what it seems.

Your perfect list

1. Draw up a list with two headings like this:

Perfect/Not Perfect

Begin to itemize five things that go under the two categories.

For example, you might have this:

Perfect:

My house

My husband

My son/daughter

My face

My job

Not Perfect:

My finances

My health

My car

My temper

My cravings

2. Focus on your list and be aware of the sensations you experience. There is no right or wrong way to feel. Just practice awareness when you switch from the perfect to the not perfect.

Here’s an intriguing mind-set: There is no such thing as imperfection, because perfection is everywhere.

For example, a beautiful forest sanctuary is a perfect picture of nature’s bounty and balance of natural elements—air, water, earth, light.

A garbage dump is a perfect example of disorder and uncleanliness.

Both pictures reflect the perfection of balance and imbalance.

The moment realization sets in that perfection is a conscious choice of the world we have, then a deep sense of responsibility sets in. You become more conscious about the choices you make.

Choice leads to circumstances

According to the book “The Heart of the Soul” by Gary Zukav and Linda Francis, greater emotional awareness can be achieved when we see clearly that the very choices we make create the circumstances we live in.

Once we see the perfect lessons in our perfect mistakes, then and only then are we able to change ourselves.

There is more. If we do not reach that point of realization, we will continue to be filled with regret, pain, bitterness over the past. We will continue to see ourselves as victims of an uncaring, uncontrollable universe when, in truth, the fault was ours all along. We are to blame for our own failure to see that our decisions in the past put us where we are in the present.

There is no other force out there that creates your particular circumstance.   That force or dynamic is you. Recognize this force as one within your control.

If you seek perfectionism beyond what is your present reality, then you are escaping from the truth of the moment.

At this point, you will imagine yourself in some fantasy world, far removed from who you are right now. If you consider yourself a perfectionist, try to stop for a minute your compelling urge to arrange, re-arrange, control and put into its perfect place whatever it is.

Workaholics pay attention: When you feel that you are overwhelmed with work, slow down, then take a break.

The compulsive need to control everything you do and everyone in your life is, beneath your aggressive appearance, an act of avoiding pain. The need to seek perfection on the outside is indicative of perfect imbalance of emotions on the inside.

The best medicine for emotional pain is not to run away but toward it. When you acknowledge the present moment for all the pain it carries, healing begins. With healing comes the promise of new happiness. This, because your heart is open.

This week’s affirmation: “I am perfection in progress.”

Love and light!

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