I had a personal brush with one of these ?MMs? not on any thoroughfare but while we were parked in a gas station
IN THE PAST FEW YEARS I?VE SEEN an increasing number of motorcycles gunning down the streets of Metro Manila and even along Edsa! They weave in and out of traffic, snatching the title ?King of the Road? from the jeepneys. They seem unfazed by the fact that there are no motorcycle lanes.

A friend once told me motorcycles are ?organ-donor machines? and that is no exaggeration considering everything I?ve seen and heard living in Taiwan where cyclists rule. Most of my friends there are physicians and they narrate horrible tales of gruesome accidents involving motorbikes.

Yet, I tried my hand at riding one out of curiosity. I have a type A personality and just recently learned how to ride a bicycle. This combination isn?t exactly ideal. Since I am a newbie at this, in my nervousness I would grip the motorcycle handle on the right which makes the bike shoot forward like a bucking bronco or I could brake too hard and get thrown off. I lasted less than five minutes before I realized I?d rather walk or take a cab and keep my organs for now, thank you very much.

I had a personal brush with one of these MMs (motorcycle morons) not on any thoroughfare but while we were parked in a gas station. Yes, our car was stationary so let me repeat we were not even on the road but we got into an almost-accident. My blood boils every time I recount the incident.

Our driver pulled into a gas station somewhere in San Juan. He chose the pump in the lane next to the road. Naturally, there is a sidewalk separating the street and our parking spot. I was seated beside the driver and my mom behind me. I heard her say ?a mosquito!? and she started to unlatch the door to let the creature out.

I would do the same thing since I consider it extremely icky to use my hands to squash the nasty bugger. Yes, she could have opened the window instead but the chances of successfully shooing out insects are better through a bigger opening, don?t you think? Haven?t you experienced flapping your hands and arms like crazy trying to get an airborne bug out through the car window only for it to fly back in? Anyway, so I heard a familiar click as my mom started opening the door.

All of a sudden, faster than a speeding bullet, from out of nowhere a motorcycle zipped past the narrow path between our car and the sidewalk curb. Apparently, the dolt wanted to avoid the traffic and take a shortcut. Had my mom opened the door a fraction of an inch more? I shudder to think what might have happened! I was too shell-shocked to do anything.

Normally I?d scream at the perpetrator in the hopes that he would get disoriented and fall off due to a momentary lapse in concentration, that is, if he even has a functioning brain to begin with.

Accountability

In Taiwan, whatever happens, even if it is the fault of the motorcyclist, the automobile driver will always be held responsible for the accident. This is one instance of how immensely unfair life can be. I knew that if we had ?sideswiped? the dimwit, we could end up being blamed for not looking first before opening the door even if it?s not something you would normally think of doing while immobile in a gas station, duh?! Where is the logic in that?

The world is full of blockheads and someone could actually rule in favor of the numbskull. And then we would have to load him in our car to take him to the emergency room and be expected to shoulder his medical expenses. Can you imagine the aggravation?!

We had a close call, but other people weren?t so lucky. A classmate of mine was hit by a motorcyclist while she was crossing a pedestrian lane but survived the ordeal with scratches and bruises.

A similar thing happened to a client?s employee but she sustained fractures of the hips and skull?and she had just delivered a baby a month prior. My teacher was also hit by an MM and she had to have an operation on her leg. The idiot who did this to her wreaked havoc on the university?s teaching schedule. He also deprived many students of their education since they missed out on finishing their lessons with this beloved and well-respected professor.

What gives here? It seems that getting on a motorbike causes one to develop a blind spot for the stripes meant to protect those travelling on foot.

There was a time when the news was inundated with stories of inebriated motorcyclists plowing under trucks or hitting cars head on. Should death of the rider be the outcome, may the Lord forgive me for not feeling an iota of sympathy since it is one less evil the world can do without.

Motorcycle morons are a menace to society. They are idiots in the true sense of the word including those nuisance candidates for the presidency. How many more victims will these moronic, imbecilic, idiotic ignoramuses claim?

(Hmmm, it doesn?t matter who I?m talking about seeing as the labels apply to both groups.)